A
female
age
41-50,
*ee83
writes:help i just found out that i am 2 months pregnant the thing is that it is a result of rape. my family is pushing me to abord it but i dont think i can. i dont know why but something is pushing me to have this baby. i dont know what to do i need some advise Reply to this Question
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female
reader, dee83 +, writes (14 January 2008):
dee83 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionjust to answer a few question im 24 and i did not know the man. he has been arrested though.
A
female
reader, Crisy  +, writes (14 January 2008):
 Mabye this feeling your having to keep the baby is that this baby is still a part of you, its your little son or daughter. It might just be me being bias because i believe abortion is murder. What ever you decide to do just remember its your choice and only yours. Remember a baby is alot of work, you dont want to wake up in the middle of the night to see to the baby and regret it. Whatever you decide to do i wish you luck, im sure youll make the right decision xx
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2008): Dear dee
Just came across your post, so sorry this has happened to you. You don't say how old you are,did you report this? if so did the not recomed you take tests and speak to someone about all of this, as I just feel there is mixed post in this and may not help you.I am not going to give an opinion either way although I have my owm opinion but that might not help you, see what I mean? You are 8 weeks pregnant speak with a professional as at the end of the day only you can make this choice and live with it. Whatever choice you make don't feel bad or guilty as you did not ask for any of this take care and hope it all works out
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A
male
reader, Uncle Trev +, writes (14 January 2008):
Firstly I am very sorry to hear of this awful thing that has happened to you.
At the end of the day it has got to be your choice and nobody elses. All anybody could give you here in terms of advice is what they would do if they were in your shoes but that may not be the best for you personally.
I know that if I were in your shoes I would abort for the simple reason that I do not feel I could relate to a child that was conceived this way - also here in the UK even though you were raped the father would still have some parental right regarding contact and would still be in your life to a certain extent. I would find it very difficult to move on in this situation, if I was in your shoes I could not and would not want to handle this.
Although this is what I would do it is not necessary the best thing for you. You have to weigh up the consequences of both scenarios and then have to make the decision based upon this.
Cheers
Trev
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A
female
reader, Variety +, writes (14 January 2008):
 If you want the baby then you should have it. However you need to think carefully about the emotional impact that caring for this child will have on you. Having children is very difficult and can you promise never in a moment of anger to accuse the child of being like their rapist father? And what will you do when they ask about their Daddy? I realise these are extreme scenarios but they should all be considered. You are still in shock over what happened so you need to talk to someone in depth about this decision. A professional as well as your family.
Don't abort a baby if you don't want to.
Hope this helps. Message me if you want to chat. x
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2008): At the end of the day the choice is yours and yours alone! Its your body, your baby, your choice what you want to do - remember that!
Keeping the baby will be a constant reminder of what happened and how you conceived the baby - do you think you can live with that for the rest of your life? How do you think you could explain that to your child when its older?
Then again - so many people can't have kids of their own and would do anything to have a baby! Have you thought about fostering/adoption if you have the baby also?
I kno you don't have an awful lot of time left to really think about it, but maybe try and talk to other girls who were raped and had babies as a result!
Best of luck with what ever decision you decide on.. x
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A
female
reader, I.miss.yooh  +, writes (14 January 2008):
Im soooo sorry to hear that. Even though you were raped, i think you should have it. If you feel you should then do it. Its a HUGE decision and i hope your family and friends realise you need to feel free to make it. I am rather against abortion, as it is taking a live, through my eyes. But if you feel your not ready, then dont..But i think you should.
much love xxx
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2008): Is something pushing you to HAVE this baby or to HAVE and KEEP this baby? It's normal not to want to kill a growing baby inside of you, but you've gotta ask yourself what your really motivation is.
Are you trying to make something good come from the rape?
Do you not want to kill any baby growing inside you?
Do you just want a baby in the normal sense, and this just happens to be a pretty unfortunate way to have gotten pregnant?
Does some part of you want to "punish" yourself for being raped by having to give birth to his child? And possibly even raise it for another 20 years?
Was the rape by a person you didn't really know, or was the rapist an acquaintance or boyfriend or something? You relationship to the father might be making a big difference in your feelings about this.
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2008): sweety no because you might never get the chane to get pegnant again. Try to make the best out of it - yes days would come when you look at that child and you remember everything that happened, you might be shocked to see that that one little heartbreak makes you so proud. Take it from some one who has been there and made the wrong mistake and is suffering for it, I can't have children, I wish that I had the courage you have and ask for advice and not do what i did.
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A
female
reader, SilverSong86  +, writes (14 January 2008):
Hey there dearie! I would say that you should be strong and stand up to your family. Even though this child has not come under circumstances that anyone would choose, children are often a great blessing. I (and this is my personal opinion) think that life is sacred and should be honored when it is created. I know this is going to be one of the hardest decisions of your life, but often when women have abortions they slip into a deep depression afterward. I don't want you to have any regrets. I understand how your family feels given everything that's going on, but I do believe that if you really talk to them they would take your side. I'm sure they love you very much and only want the best for you. This is your decision and regardless of what you choose life will go on. I'm not sure just how to approach your parents about this, but hopefully someone else on here will help you in that concern. Be strong and go with your gut instincts. They are powerful and are there for a reason. If you do decide not tot keep the child, however, I'd suggest you find a counselor if you feel any sadness. I wish you the best!
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A
male
reader, Moviefan +, writes (14 January 2008):
 Wow this is a hard one, i dont like the idea of abortion at the least but you were raped. If it was a child with an ex boyfriend i would say have it with out thought. But its not. Im thinking you should probably have the child like you want to, its your decesion after all. Your the one who has to deal with yourslelf the next day. And just have the child setup with a closed or open adoption. This in my opinion is the best option and it fits your feelings on the matter.
Plus a lot of couples cant have kids for one reason or another, so you letting the child live and your helping someone else at the same time.
Hope i helped.
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A
female
reader, loving_life +, writes (14 January 2008):
i am so sorry that this horrible thing has happened to you. basically even with input from this site and your family it all comes down to your own personal morals (in my opinion) its whether or not you can handle and give this baby a good life and your own personal stand on aborting a baby. i personally am pro life. but that is just me and most peoples stances change when they are thrown into the situation against there will. if you feel a strong pull to keep it, do. i dont want ot go all pro life on you, but do your research... look at it from both angles if u are seriously considering abortion, becuase its a big step and you dont want to regret giving up that piece of you (even though it may remind you of the horrible incident.) im not sure if this was of any help to you. hope you follow your heart and do what you feel is best.
feel free to message me.
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female
reader, xapathyxrebornx +, writes (14 January 2008):
 Aww hun I am sorry to har about the rape its an awful time to go through.
To terminate or keep your baby is YOUR choice.
I wish you the best of luck, talk with your family and tell them hw you feela nd tell them it's your choice.
RavenXx
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