A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: I broke up with my old gf back in June. We'd been together about a year and a half. Started dating this other girl(B) who lives 45 mins away from me in August. Now some may think this is classic rebound behavior. Maybe maybe not, but I don't think I was just rebounding onto her. I really like her. And I thought she likes me back, maybe more than just liking me back. We have incredible chemistry together, but it's not just that. We'd been seeing each other a lot, for about a month, talking on the phone everyday for hours sometimes, and we'd even got to a semi-serious stage (I love yous, and want to be with you stage, come meet my parents stage). But then, for the last month or so she totally disappears off the face of the earth. She doesn't call me, she won't return phone calls, nothing. It coincided with her best friend returning from visiting her hubby abroad. So I don't know wot is going on with her.Her friend who returned from abroad was online on B's id, and she said B just left. But that B had a lot of shit going on right now. So B wasn't talking to anybody, including her. I hear she may have lost/quit her job. And her dad may be sick. I really care for her and would support her, but I don't know wot to make off the fact that she hasn't called me in a while, and won't even talk to me.so it just feels weird not knowing wots going on. i don't mind waiting for her, if she's going through a bad situation, but being kept in the dark !?wot would you do!?
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best friend, broke up, hasn't called Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Tommy7 +, writes (15 October 2007):
Send her your picture in a get well card. Ask her out and include an RSVP stamped card.
A
female
reader, Sassister +, writes (15 October 2007):
You need to ask yourself if you could live with her style of disappearing whenever stress enters her life. This could be her coping style.
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A
reader, I Dont Lie +, writes (15 October 2007):
Wait for her to come to you is all you can do. If she needed someone to confide in, she would've either come to you or her friends, but clearly she isn't at the moment as she has been avoiding most people. This is a strong indication that she's not so keen in being the sociable person just right now, and wants to be alone., so leaving her be would be the best for now.
But the snag is, it isn't really fair on your part when you're being kept in the dark from it all. Try doing a little bit of homework about what she is really going through (without persistant pestering), and if you sense she is really going through a rough patch, then perhaps waiting for her like you said you would wouldnt be a bad idea. But if this lingers on without even a smidgen of indication that she is still interested in you, then you should know what to do. So what you do in a situation like this is really trial and error. But since you've said that waiting for her to come around is something you dont mind doing, then that shouldnt bother you in the meantime, just make sure you dont end up waiting forever.
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