A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I love this girl, we are very close an she says she likes me alot, more than friends, when were together we hug an kiss, and we spend the best times together, i know its ment to be, but her head is all over the place at the moment and she doesnt want to be with anyone, it breaks my heart that we cant be with each other properly, what do i do? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2010): thanks so much for your help, its just the fact she really likes me too.
A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (13 January 2010):
 All you can do is accept it. This can be her way to say "I don't want a relationship with you, ever" or her way to say exactly what she said, "My head is not right at the moment". Whatever she is saying, it's not "yeah, let's have something", and you can't push it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2010): I am in exactly the same position as you. I'm 26 and have known my best friend for 12 years. We are very close and I truly believe it is meant to be. I can't imagine my life with any other girl. I have told her I love her and this hasn't scared her off but she says because of her low self esteem and depression she doesn't want a relationship with anyone at the moment. We are in contact every day and see each other most days and are as close as we could be without dating (so close many outsiders think we are a couple). I think all you can do is to spend as much time with her so when she feels ready for dating you will be at the front of the queue if it is you that she wants. Also spend as much time with her as possible then if she does date someone else hopefully when you suddenly aren't there all the time she will "miss you". Jealousy and timing are two of the things that can make this sort of relationship click into place I think. Just don't give up because I do truly believe that you in your heart KNOW when you've met the right one.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2010): This may not be the greatest advice...but as any other agony aunt - though I do truly admit not being the best..I have to try, and practice, try to help people. Anyway, I was just going to say that I really like this guy who is 27, and he knows I do - and he likes me..but I'm not ready for a relationship, I am scared of being hurt. And believe me, it breaks my heart also knowing that he wants something which I feel....a little resistant to. But let me not forget what I'm trying to say: the fact is, simply put, that if she LOVES you, and you definitely love her, then you will be together eventually. Being ready takes time. "it breaks my heart that we can't be with each other properly" you CAN! Just not yet. Be patient and she will respect you immensely. Like I do towards the guy I love.
Don't get me wrong though - don't pretend to be someone you're not, but everyone can try to hold on, and get through the stages which are hard, because really, those stages only makes the love and trust stronger. :)
Hope I was of some help, if you want to ask anything, just ask! :)
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A
female
reader, Ask_Pol +, writes (13 January 2010):
 In this situation I would give the person some space for a couple of days so that they hcan have time to work out what they want without being constantly asked what they want. If you are meant to be together then it'll work out.
Give her time to sort her head out and then she'll let you know where you stand.
I hope that is of some help and that things work out for both of you be it together or apart.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (13 January 2010):
All you can do is accept that at this moment there is a lot going on. She has made it clear that she doesn't want to be with anyone, so be a good friend, but accept that the chances are there will be nothing more in it.
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