A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:11 months ago i met a girl. At the time she told me she was 18. Months later the truth came out that she was 16. i am 22 years old. It wasnt hard to believe that she was older than her real age. Her friends are all around my age. Her Ex bf is a month younger than myself. She was home schooled which made it seem as if she was out of highschool.By the time i found out she was 16 i have developed strong feelings for this girl. Ive never been sexual with her because i wasn't looking for that. Now that i know her real age i just cant imagine being sexual at all with her anytime soon. But i truly deeply care about this girl. I encourage her to better herself, She didnt have the best group of friends and ive helped her move passed them and progress in her studies.The truth is that i am in love with this girl. Ive tried to end it because the age thing has just bothered me but i cant seem to get her off my mind. It doesnt help that she feels the same way.Should i give this a chance?OrShould i move on? Id really hate to break her heart. and as much as i tried to fight every step of the way of ending it with her. I could never get over her.I wrote this before but i wanted to add some additional information.I recieved many responses saything maybe she wasnt trustworthy. this is not the case at all.She is the sweetest nicest girl that anyone can meet such a warm personality. She lied to me because she knew i would never give her the chance i have given to her. She has only ever had one other Bf which is the guy who is my age. they were together for 4 years she was 12 and he 18 when they met.I couldnt see myself with a 12 year old when i was 18 . This guy is just a real jerkoff. He is just a lowlife who took her virginity at 13. according to her it wasnt a real serious sexual relationship. it occured several times throughout the years. He cheated on her and treated her badly. She thought she was in love with him at the time. Then she met me. I guess i turned everything around.I do have feelings for this girl and one major reason i have not wanted to leave her is because otheer guys intentions. She's a very beautiful. Guys comee at her all the time and can be brash about it. Im worried that if i was to leave her after a while she would just get with some guy my age and he'll have the wrong intentions and would only use her for sex. I just wouldnt want her to get hurt.Ive met her mother once before she said it was pefectly fine that i see her daughter although i think she believes im 18 not 22. The situation is really bad. but i have strong feelings for this girl which makes it hard to decide what to do.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 October 2010): Bottom line is she is 16. You are 22. Yes, shes a nice girl and all; and you love her. But that can change very very quickly. Just be wary that if it does go south at any time during the next 2 years she can turn you into the cops. Doesn't seem like something she would do now, but remember. Hell hath no fury, as a woman scorned.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 September 2010): Tbh i think you should stop worrying so much. Seriously, age doesnt really matter you hear about 16 year olds dating older guys all the time. Girls often go for older guys anyway. But dont use her and jus stay with her because you feel sorry for her. Trueth is that you dont want her yourself but you dont want someone else to have her. If you ask me you should decide quick time because your out of order. If you love her that much and care of her you would stay with her and not let a little thing like age bother you.
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A
male
reader, dirtball +, writes (24 September 2010):
 Lies beget more lies. Tell her mom you're 22 and see if she still approves of you dating her daughter.
Listen, you sound like a nice guy, and have a genuine interest in this girl. There isn't anything wrong with that unless the relationship gets sexual.
I just don't like all the lies. She lied to you so she "would have a chance." She lied to her mom about your age because she knew her mom wouldn't accept her dating someone your age. Nice guy or not, she is manipulating the situations to suit her wants and desires. She may be the sweetest girl on earth, but these aren't "white lies." It's a giant red flag in my book.
I would suggest a close friendship until she turns 18. If you still feel strongly for eachother at that time, then do whatever it is you'll likely have craved for a couple of years by that point. Just end all the lying.
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A
male
reader, gigolojone  +, writes (24 September 2010):
 Since you are a decent and respectful guy who isn't thinking of getting sexual with her,i suggest you keep it burning.
As long as you bring positive vibe with you and ain't going to mislead her in any way,why not. You can keep the relationship and some day soon when she comes of age,you can think of getting sexual if you are both ready for it.
Keep her away from danger by not calling it off and also remember age ain't nothing but just a number.
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A
female
reader, SallyR87  +, writes (24 September 2010):
 You sound like a decent guy and your feelings sound genuine. Therefore... give it a shot and encourage honest discussion and communication with her. Don't worry about the age gap - if it's not a nice guy like yourself enjoying her company, it could be some dodgy fiend who preys on young girls. She sounds like she could benefit from a positive male relationship.
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