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age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: So... I met this girl online on a dating chat site. The kind where you have your own avatar and walk around a virtual world and etc. We have been together on this site for about... 2 weeks give or take. spending upwards of 8 hours a day with each other. She's amazing in chat, thoughtful, friendly and etc. I have also talked to her on the phone.Here's the thing. She says she loves me. Not just run of the mill love either. Deep Love. I was blindsided by her charm and intelligent mind, plus she is cute so I opened myself up for this one and said "I love u too"Now, she's talking about having a baby with me! Plus, she has 4 children. And now this "deep love" thing. I just feel overwhelmed here. She dropped all of these atom bombs on me in the space of one day.I don't like to say the L word and not honor it, so I don't want to run here.... I don't want to hurt her. What can I do here? Am I wrong to be alarmed? Would any guys here give me the green light on this? Ladies? Your input? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, dorothy2342  +, writes (8 March 2010):
 Well I'm with you on the crazy part. You are in for one heck of a rude awakening. Good luck and I mean it. I hope she will be all you think she is and I hope she continues to make you happy. My remarks were strickly hard love.
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 March 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell did you miss the part about me waiting on an std test? She endangered herself and the lives of her four kids because we didn't know for sure if I had something. No way around that.
Every hustler I know would have waited for that blood test.
Also I have told her I am poor, I do construction, and she even saw my car, an.old A to B'er beat up chariot. If she were a hustler she'd be lookin for a richer man. My car didn't even have a radio or heat lolol
I may not be thinking rationally in many ways, but I am right about her not bein a hustla. Its not even debatable.
We are just two crazy kids in an even crazier world
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female
reader, dorothy2342 +, writes (8 March 2010):
Quote "but she too reckless to be a hustler, Celtic. Rule number one of a hustler, never endanger yourself." Sorry, she isn't endangering herself if what she is hustling is a daddy for her four or now five kids. You are still not thinking rationally.
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female
reader, dorothy2342 +, writes (8 March 2010):
Sorry guy you get what you ask for and a whole lot more. Not as if you weren't warned or anything.
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni thought about this long and hard... I've dealt with con artists and hustlers, you know.but she too reckless to be a hustler, Celtic. Rule number one of a hustler, never endanger yourself.I was still waiting for my bloodtest results to come in, and she wanted to have unprotected sex anyway when we got caught up in the moment. Add to that that she's only been with three dudes in her life, not including me, and hadn't had sex in 7 months.Whereas I, have a far more varied, and shady past, sexually. I'm actually kind of worried about it. No unprotected sex in my time, but plenty of unprotected oral.So she might be crazzzy... but not a hustler and i know this for a fact. She told me later she was worried about losing me and that's why she wanted me to do it. Thanks for the input, I guess in the end Ima do what im gonna do regardless.
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female
reader, celtic_tiger  +, writes (6 March 2010):
 I think you have been conned. Why did you not use contraception? Why did you have sex with her so soon after meeting her for the first time?
The fact that you tried to use the pull out method (which is unreliable the majority of times), and she activly stopped you, suggests to an outside eye that she had one goal only - to get pregnant. I fear she may have been using you as a sperm doner.
Please be careful of this woman, because if you are now the father of her child, you will be in line to pay out for it. Now she has got what she wants, she may well dump you and take you to the cleaners, so please watch out.
IF she is not pregant, I really so suggest you run away as fast as you can. I can only see bad things happenening here.
Good luck.
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 March 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionUpdate, we met IRL, great chemistry, great sex...one thing led to another and.. I guess I'm a dad now. I was trying to the pull out thing, but she was too much...Purposefully, I might add..she was clenching those muscles like mad, and wrapping her legs around me..
So.. yea
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female
reader, Nice.Girl  +, writes (4 March 2010):
 Have you tried flat-out telling her that she's moving too fast for you? You would be amazed at how easily someone can understand that. Tell her that she's moving a little faster than you like in a relationship and explain to her that you don't take declarations of love half-heartedly. You feel that you could love her, but that you should get to know one another more.
Also, if she has four children, shouldn't she be a bit more concerned about what's good for them? That's four lives that she's responsible for and she should be more picky on who she drops the L bomb on. As well, isn't the typical form in a woman's mind to fall in love, get married or move in together, then have a baby? I know, I wouldn't want to even consider children until I'm in a comfortable situation and know that they are reliable enough to trust with the task of creating a new life.
I also question the fact that all four of her children are from the same man. Mostly because she's so fast to want to reproduce with you.
The internet isn't exactly the real world, and you kind of want to look at the reputation of the spot you met the woman on as well. Chat sims, chat rooms, dating sites they pretty much are like a giant club. You should really meet in person before you make any decisions about how you really feel, because things can really change when you meet in person.
Either way, these are some dangerous waters, so tread carefully.
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionok... No its not a joke post.Anon, I guess I was blindsided by this girl. It happens, right? you say we've only spent a short amount of time together, but, like I've said, 8 hours a day, from when I get off work to the wee hours of the morn, for two weeks straight. Its like 1 or 2 months at least, in real time, because normally a date don't last that long. So I actually know a lot about her that someone in a normal type thing wouldn't know for months. She kept those things I mentioned from me because she was afraid it would push me away. Her fear was very legitimate. But I know a lot about her besides the "atom bombs"CaringGuy, I think close to the same, I told her I would need more time to get to a level of "deep love" with her, and I told her I don't know what she means by that. Also, I said she was of the type that I would consider having a baby with, but there are a lot of obstacles and pitfalls in our way first before we get there, that it was at the end of a very long road and we weren't there yet.Dorothy, neither of us are desperate. You wouldn't believe the amount of dudes I had to fight off to get this woman in the first place. One guy even stalked us around the chat world for six days and threatened to kill me in real life, and I gave the address of my boxing gym irl and said put your money where your mouth is, cuz I knew he was a fraud. Then I had him banned. So I stuck my neck out on many occasions, and scattered her would be suitors with a combination of wit, verve, and aplomb. But, I'm not desperate either. I'm a young man in my physical prime, and not bad looking at all. I dropped and ended several opportunities to be with this woman. She said all her children were by one dad. I don't want to run, that seems like something a coward would do. I don't say the L word lightly. This is my dilemma
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female
reader, dorothy2342 +, writes (17 February 2010):
I have to agree, you need serious help if you think love is involved. You both sound a little desperate. Stop, turn and run the other way as fast as you can. Stop all contact with her and start thinking with your head and not your hormones. Love is something that grows and developes between to people that know each other for a long time. She has four children; how many fathers were involved in that. Run
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male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (17 February 2010):
Big Red light, flashing with several alarms. 2 weeks is way too soon to be talking about love and a baby together. You've not even met in person! This requires a lot more time before you go any further. Be careful.
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2010): You almost sound as crazy as the girl your chatting with.. Seriously.. read back to yourself what you just wrote... How does that sound to you? Messed up? Nonsense? Yup thats about right. How could you possibly "deeply love" someone and want to have their children all in one day? You dont even know each other. You have never spent time together etc. I really hope your post was a joke. I cant even get over how ridiculous it is.
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