A
male
age
36-40,
*arbles162008
writes:I'm so confused right now. We were doing great and it's been 4 months. It starts off like this. I met her at a party 6 months ago while I was playing a guitar. She found me on facebook the next day and told me how amazing I was and wanted to get to know me better.So we started talking, for 2 entire months. Finally we decided to make it offical and begin dating. Let me tell you, we never had moments where we weren't laughing, smiling, or having the best time. We slept together however the first night we hung out. She told me every single day that she cared about me, that she couldnt see herself without me. I felt soooo comfortable with her. She would always message me every morning and every night. Now everything was great, near the end it didn't change. She stayed over at my house from Friday till Monday on New Years weekend. First day we went to a party and hung out with friends, 2nd night she spent new years day with my family, 3rd day I took her out on an amazing date to the movies and to a nice resturant. She never stopped smiling and thanking me either. Before she left that weekend she left me a note under my pillow telling me that I was the best boyfriend shes ever had and that she's so thankful for our day. She had started taking birth control a week prior to that weekend. Over that weekend she was looking up things on that type of birth control and symptoms caused depression, lack of excitement, etc. 2 days after that weekend she broke up with me through texts. She than sent me an email telling me she needs time to herself. That she can't be in a relationship and that she's going through things that she'd never mentioned. So i emailed her a week later just to see how she was and she told me that we had no connection what so ever, and that if I contact her again she'll take to different measures. We had such a connection in my opinion though. She spent so much money for me on christmas and would text me constantly telling me she wanted me there with her. That is, whenever we weren't together.I hadn't talked to her since the breakup so I was confused. She'd never told me the reason why we couldnt talk anymore. I just want to be her friend at least, be there for her while she's going through the hardships in her life right now. To this day she hasn't said a word to me. She also blocked my number. If I didn't do anything wrong, and I've given her my very best, why is it that she can't talk to me?
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female
reader, Whimsey  +, writes (26 January 2011):
I know that soon I will leave my boyfriend, I feel unsure about our future and have expressed this to him. But she didnt seem to give you a chance. I say forget her, maybe it was the hormones, or maybe some internal struggle she just couldn't talk to you about. Either way you sound like a great guy and Im sure you will find someone more reliable.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 January 2011): I'm going through something very similar. I actually ended it because I couldn't be with someone who didn't know from one minute to the next. He was with me everyday and never left my side, but I couldn't shake this feeling of him not being sure. I wasn't sure either but that's why you date, right!?! believe you when you say there was that connection, and things were great. Here's a thought: maybe they are just depressed and maybe they will regret the wonderful thing they had. I am still struggling even though I ended because of my gut. OR maybe they aren't a good person! Who knows!?! I'm still struggling!
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A
male
reader, marbles162008 +, writes (25 January 2011):
marbles162008 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks alot for the honest post. I'm just lost and trying to figure out what I should do. I know I need to move on, I'm just having a rough time because it came so suddenly. I felt as though I could fix it but I can't. I appreciate your feedback. Maybe I'll be friends with her down the line in the future, but I'm just still shocked right now that she left me behind.
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A
male
reader, Kilcardy +, writes (25 January 2011):
Marbles...with all due respect...if you try and stay "friends" with this flake of a woman while really wanting a full on relationship with her...you'll feel like your losing your marbles. And, let's be honest. You don't want to be buddys with her. You want her. You want to be in a relationship with her. You want to be her one and only. Otherwise you wouldn't be grasping at straws like the fact that she still has your pics up on her FB page (oh! really?...sounds like your gonna get laid tonight!) The only problem is that she has more baggage apparently than a 747! Trying to hang on as as friend is going to make you look clingy, weak, and, ultimately, pathetic. You won't be happy just being her friend. Trust me on that. Unless you like pain, drama, misery and looking like a total loser I would strongly recommend you move on. But, if that's the sort of thing you need in your life, then by all means, go for it. I say of all of this with brotherly love and wish you all the best.
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A
male
reader, marbles162008 +, writes (25 January 2011):
marbles162008 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI know it's not a rebound or marriage. Her last relationship was almost 2 years ago. And I truly think shes just single and going through stuff. She even still has our photos up on facebook whereas I deleted the photos on mine. If she was thinking about someone else, I would think she'd delete them. I just don't wanna lose her cause we were like best friends when we were dating. Even if we could be friends I'd be happy.
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A
male
reader, Kilcardy +, writes (25 January 2011):
The woman is crazy. She's a flake. Do yourself a favor and forget her.
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A
male
reader, marbles162008 +, writes (25 January 2011):
marbles162008 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI agree, it shocked me completely, I was there when she needed me, always polite and romantic, wasn't too needy, gave her space for friends and school, wrote cute songs for her as I'm a local musician in my area. And she was all for it, so excited. I'd catch her listening to my recordings and watching my youtube videos all the time. So I don't understand the lack of connection
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A
male
reader, Advice_man +, writes (25 January 2011):
 I am 34 and to this day i have never, ever really understood what's on women minds!! They act so strange. I read your story and i am speechless, i have nothing to comment! Maybe a female reader can through some light to this story...
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