A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I've been with my boyfriend 6 months. Yet we've never fully had sex. He's on the large side penis wise, but I've had boyfriends with large penises before and it's never been this much of a problem.It just really, really hurts! When he first goes to enter me, it's so painful, even with lots of foreplay beforehand and me feeling horny. We've tried romantic evenings with a bubble bath and a bottle of wine, hours of foreplay, lubrication. I've been to the doctor 3 times, they've done a few tests and say there's nothing wrong with me.This lack of sex is killing my relationship - we're strong in every other way but it's starting to put a wedge in the middle of us - obviously it's upsetting me as I feel there's something wrong with me, and he just doesn't know how to help me.
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female
reader, imcurioustoo  +, writes (23 June 2009):
Try the romantic setting more often and also make sure your body is relaxed don't be assuming it won't work.. If he takes it very slowly your body will except him.. It may take a while but it sounds to me that you may need other forms of help there's something called a dialator look it up that could help an also look for his size sex toys and use them so that your compfortable then your body will be more excepting to him.... hope this helps best of luck
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 June 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you sooo much SatinDesire (and also to everyone else for being so helpful) I just felt a whoosh of relief when I read the symptoms, I've felt so lost these past 5 months, like it's all my fault but I didn't know what it was!!
Hopefully I can now figure out a way to get on the road to fixing this :)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 June 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI've just read that link to Vaginismus info - I think that's me! I misread what you put earlier and thought you said Vaginitus, which I was checked for.
But all the symptoms I can totally relate to, and it says you can experience it at any time in your life, and that it can possibly come about after a traumatic experience - the last time I had sex was before my ex boyfriend physically attacked me last year.
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A
male
reader, holikdad +, writes (22 June 2009):
Something else occurred to me as well, they sell numbing creams at certain sex shops that you may want to look into. Usually these creams are for people experiencing with anal sex, but I bet they'll work for the vaginal area as well.
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A
male
reader, holikdad +, writes (22 June 2009):
Is it a stabbing pain or a stretching pain? Usually you can tell the difference.
Have you tried different positions to see if any of them make it easier? Usually if you can get started then your vaginal area will relax.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 June 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI was checked for that and aparently came out all clear...I'm feeling so lost!
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