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age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: im sorry if this is innapropriate but am i right in this? ive been with my boyfriend for just over 8 months now, we started going out in december and we lost our virginities to each other in march. we both felt we were ready and it was the right thing to do. we were both legal nd prepared. but he expects it all the time. althought when i say i dont want to do anything he listens and doesnt force me into anything, when its that time of month, the last thing thats on your mind is sex. right? its not as if you feel too good anyway, well i personally dont feel like adding to the pain anyway. but when it is that time hes always asking me for stuff, like hes like well if we cant have sex can i have a blowjob n stuff, for example, i got my period on the 6th of this month, and i stopped at his on wednesday just gone (9th) and he goes 'ahh babe i need a wank' so i wa like well dont let me stop ya, cause hes open about it lol so he wa like do it for me, so me been stupid, did it, n he wa like gonna suck me off babe? n i wa like no. n then we ended up argueing and i ended up going home, i get wound up at the best of times and he doesnt help, but its not as if you can do anything anyway, am i right to turn him down one week out of the month? should i be giving him oral and not be bothered about recieving anything back. its not just the part that i dont feel too good but its the though of him gettin the pleasure while i cant do owt lol x
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male
reader, ChiRaven  +, writes (11 July 2008):
 If you WANT something from him and he fails to deliver, then you are right to complain. If you don't want anything from him and he's asking for something from you, you'll have to ask yourself how you feel about that and why you feel that way. It sounds to me like you're resenting the fact that he's getting something and you're not, even though you don't WANT him to do anything for you at that time of month. And that attitude is just a little unreasonable.
Some couples prefer to abstain during that particular time of month, and especially if you experience other painful symptoms that's probably a good idea. But if the two of you are really close that should not preclude you from physical intimacy that does not involve intercourse.
Let him know that you find all directly sexual contact at that time difficult and distasteful, but that you WOULD like to just be together physically with no "goal" in mind. That can help reinforce the bond between the two of you, and underscore the fact that the two of you have a real relationship, not just something physical. Tell him you understand his physical needs, and you'll be glad to see that they get met the rest of the time (in fact, let him know how much you enjoy it!), but that this time of month puts you through some very real physical changes that call for a change in the program.
A
female
reader, PsyCookie +, writes (11 July 2008):
 It's true what the other aunties say, if you don't feel right about doing something, then don't do it.
What I also suggest you to do is to talk to your boyfriend about this. Tell him that you're on your period and that you don't feel comfortable in doing it. If he really loves you, he'll understand and probably just cuddle with you.
Remember, communication is key in a relationship and if you don't tell him why you're rejecting his advances during your period he will take it badly and think bad thoughts
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 July 2008): Wow that was the shortest answer I've ever done!
Seriously, if you don't want to do it you shouldn't have to do it. Sex is a two way thing, not a one way thing.
Personally I wouldn't want to do it at that point of the month because...well. You know...
Unless she was my wife...
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 July 2008): To put it simply, you shouldn't do anything your not comfortable with, period.
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female
reader, HonningKanin  +, writes (11 July 2008):
 If you are not in the mood, your not in the mood. Its as simple as that.There are woman who still want sex on their periods, but they are in the mood. If you are then you aren't and thats all you have to say to your boyfriend. Explain to him why you dont want to have sex around that time, the pain you feel and of you feeling left out if he is pleased and you arent. Just be honest with him and ask him to respect that. If he truely understands he will back off.I am sure both of you are using condoms and are on the pill because i doubt either of you want a little one. If you think period pains are bad.. I would hate to think what you would say about child labor pains.
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 July 2008): If a man cant do without sex once a month god forbid!!! Whay would happen if he was sent to the forces or had to work away for sometime would he be unfaithful. I would not like a man who wants it all the time.
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