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age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Ok, so Im 15 and every lad I know thinks Im ugly. Even the ones who, themselves never get girlfriends, call me ugly. It really, really gets me down. They dont count my personality or how well we get on for anything. I DO have a nice body and my boobs are of decent size (34D) but that never gets noticed. All my friends are getting boyfriends and have had them recently. You might say "Its not all about looks" but, believe me, with every lad I know, it is!! Im starting to feel abnormal and like Im never going to get a boyfriend and be happy!! Im really jealous of pretty girls and would kill to be them....just for one day!! No matter how I try to improve my look (straightening my hair, make-up, clothes, etc) it never works. My friends and family tell me im pretty but they're only say that because they have to. Will i ever find someone?? does EVERY lad go for looks?? I really need help with this one. Luciie...xxx
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 July 2012): You know that right there is low self esteeme. Everybody is pretty in their own ways personality, looks it dosent really matter you are pretty even tho i dont know how u look but god made u perfect the way he wants you to beI say dont give a thought to what people think its stupid They are just trying to make themselves feel better by criticizing other people because maybe they dont feel good bout themselves. All my friends say that im the prettiest of all the girls in our group and that i get all the guys and stuff, i am in a similar situation right now to where my bf's brother and sister think im ugly and his sister hates me ..... when my bf told me this, yea i started to get worried and over think bout '' what if this, what if that'' then i stopped and thought wait im not dating her im dating my bf the guy that i love and between u and i she aint the shit so she shouldnt be talking lol (; and trust me honey dont stress over getting a bf or anything like that, things come at there right time and when its best the more u stress the more u wont find anything :) never forget if u stop searching for a guy the guy will come to u and god has one put aside just for u. a guy that will except u for ur good and bads and all tht stuff trust me ive been through it and i waited and now its all good i have an amzing bf with a bitch of a sister and a crazy bro, but thtat shouldnt matter:) i know you will find someone in your life tht will b there and care for you when you need it :)
A
female
reader, Shellycutes14  +, writes (28 June 2012):
Hey I know what you mean...I'm always the ugly friend or always called ugly
It's really hurts me that sometimes that I cry
Well I believe god pairs us with someone
But yes most guys see a girl by her looks
But hey
You never know
Some guy can be liking you from the far
I'm not going to say that "just ignore them"
Because I'm still working on that so all I'm going to say is keep your eyes open and you'll find someone
I promise
Hope I helped
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A
female
reader, RaWr.xDD  +, writes (3 December 2009):
Well, i have the same problem but how many times have you spoken to these guys? and stop with the make-up and stuff good guys go for unique girls but all those guys who think looks are everything also those who go for trashy girls,get them out of your mind. Maybe try to start talking to a guy that respects you (a guy friend) may help. Just little things like a positive attitude,cofidence,great friends and maybe even a few days out can really make you smile.
luv
hannah...xxx
age:13
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 November 2008): I have the exact opposite problem.
I'm 15 and a model, and I dont wanna boast but im gorgeous, and i've never had a boyfriend....IT DOESNT MAKE SENSE!!!!!
Hun, Im sure you'll find someone, not all guys go for looks!
My advice, go for older guys, 17-ish....their more mature.
And if you, yourself think your ugly...change something!
Hair, clothes etc...But do it for yourself!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 November 2008): I never had a boy friend during school and college days. Not that I wasn't pursued.
Just that I wanted to make something out of myself.At 14 I wanted to stand on my own feet when I grew up.In India most of the time its the dad or the husband who picks up the tab.I can honestly say I have never got a single penny from my parents ever since I completed my education.A very rare thing let me assure you especially since I need not have worked at all in the first place.
I concentrated on my studies when some of the girls my age were busy having boy friends and seemed like were having the time of their lives.I had my crushes and infatuations.Yes it got lonely at times.Thankfully I had nice friends.But I never lost sight of the one goal that was there before me."Education".I became the school topper.Got my head into software.Today I am successful.
I am having the last laugh as those girls who laughed at me for being a bookworm got into messy affairs and couldn't even complete their studies.I waited till 24 to find my husband.It was an arranged marriage.Cultures do vary.Today I have a great guy and a gorgeous baby in my life.I can't love them enough.
Dear Little Sis, I hope my story makes you think today.Its very easy to give into peer pressure.Its very easy to be one among the crowd.Everyone else are having boyfriends.But life is much more than that.Make something of yourself.Have a healthy self esteem.
Also regarding looks,at teenage most of the girls are still blossoming.At 14 my friends used to say I look very plain and normal.But I never let it get to me nor did I feel so.Ha Ha.At 29 when I recently met my friends they gushed "The ugly duckling has turned into the best looking of the lot!".Its just the way you look at yourself.If you think you are pretty and love yourself,people are going to see you as pretty and exotic too.Feel it in your heart.All the best dear.
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A
female
reader, a friend +, writes (22 November 2008):
sure you will there must be someone out there theres plenty fish in the see i used to be the same but someone finaly same x
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 July 2008): hey, i used to feel xactly lyk u did at ur age.i thote havin a boyfrend meant a person bein pretty.wen guys dint ask me owt o wen i ws told ur ugly,it hurt,it shattered my self esteem but i neva let it show..i used to hide behind humour!bt lyk u i confided in ma frends hu pointed to things that were good in me!and now dat im older iv realised guys(not all of dem) dont care bow wot a person looks lyk but care bow wots on the insyd.its only recently i fownd owt dat d guy hu used to call me ugly in high school actali fancied me and asked me owt quite recently!my advice to u is2 b patient and dont wish to hav boyfrends coz ur frends hav sum.try gaining self esteem by seein things dat u lyk in ur self-it worked for me..xXx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 July 2008): Hey girl
Listen, alot of girls go through the same thing at your age and guess what? Those are the same girls that those guys want to date in high school and college. Your body is not fully matured yet and everything will come together! I felt SOO awkward in middle school and into high school. By the 2nd year, I almost felt like a new person because I became comfortable with myself! You will see - soon everything will come together and you will start to feel alot mor confident...confidence is VERY attractive!
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A
female
reader, bemused  +, writes (12 July 2008):
 Awww....honey do not be so hard on yourself. I would bet my bottom dollar that you have your own kind of lovliness and somewhere out there you WILL meet someone who is going to like you for just who you are. You have probably been told that before but I believe it to be true. I agree with the other posters...try not to let it get you down but it is soooo hard at the age you are at. I do know that two of my fav actresses, Julianne Moore and Sandra Bulluck said THEY were homely in high school and no one gave them a second look and look how they turned out. Just because there is no one in your school who has noticed you does not mean anything...there will be someone...just do not hide from the world so he can find you. Good luck sweetie and keep us posted.xxxxxxx
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A
female
reader, bemused +, writes (12 July 2008):
Awww....honey do not be so hard on yourself. I would bet my bottom dollar that you have your own kind of lovliness and somewhere out there you WILL meet someone who is going to like you for just who you are. You have probably been told that before but I believe it to be true. I agree with the other posters...try not to let it get you down but it is soooo hard at the age you are at. I do know that two of my fav actresses, Julianne Moore and Sandra Bulluck said THEY were homely in high school and no one gave them a second look and look how they turned out. Just because there is no one in your school who has noticed you does not mean anything...there will be someone...just do not hide from the world so he can find you. Good luck sweetie and keep us posted.xxxxxxx
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (11 July 2008): Who Cares what those people think. If they're so immature that they will only date people who are "good looking" then just let them get on with it. They are the ones who will be worse off because most pretty girls are stuck up and horrible people. Just Focus more on school work, having fun with your friends and being proud of who you are. Eventually you will find someone who loves everything about you.
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A
male
reader, Uncle Sneaker +, writes (11 July 2008):
 What attracts boys most, particularly as they start to mature a bit, is a little complicated - but it's most definitely NOT just about good looks.
I'm sure you don't look half as bad as you seem to think you do. Let's put it bluntly: you're fairly sure you aren't going to win any beauty competitions, right? That's OK. In fact that's good. I certainly wouldn't want any of those sort of women. Although, obviously, there are exceptions, girls who end up in a solid, loving relationship that really does last are mainly the very average-looking girls - so if you aren't one of the world's greatest beauties then you're probably onto a winner in the long run.
But right now I don't suppose you're interested in the long run. You want here and now, don't you?
OK. As I started saying, attraction isn't mostly about good looks. A girl who makes boys look, makes the heart jump, creates the "wow I wish I was with her" factor, has attitude, poise and confidence, and not necessarily much more - although some degreee of intelligence and the ability to hold a reasonable conversation helps too. That's what you need to concentrate on, because that's what will get you the boyfriends. Of course, as soon as they grow up a little, most of those boys who right now can't see past a superficial appearance will start to learn that looks don't really matter one iota, but you'll have to wait a few years for that. If you want boyfriends now, then be confident in yourself; hold your head high and look down on the lot of them! They'll come running - just give it a bit of time.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 July 2008): Every one told me I was ugly too the whole time I was growing up. I wouldn't take it too seriously. I don't know why young people enjoy insulting each other, but they do. None of it will matter after you get out of high school. Just be strong and don't let them destroy your confidence. Confidence is of utmost importance in attracting mates. Don't worry about getting a boyfriend at the moment and focus on yourself, developing your hobbies and interests. The boys will come around in time.
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A
female
reader, PsyCookie +, writes (11 July 2008):
 If a guy tells you you're ugly it means that they're not meant for you. And also, you're looking here at 15-year olds. Teenagers who don't even have an idea about life and have a shallow sense of beauty. I bet that when you grow up and go to college or out to the world you'll find guys who will appreciate you for who YOU are instead of how you look or what you do. I used to feel the same way you do. I didn't have a boyfriend at your age as well and I saw so many girls having boyfriends. I really didn't want one, but not having a guy asking me out made me feel not pretty. I always thought that guys didn't like me because I was ugly and let myself down many times. I even sometimes heard some girls calling me "ugly" for not having a boyfriend. Nowadays, I realize the reason I wasn't asked out was because I was intimidating because of my intelligence and that in fact I'm a beautiful person inside and out. Guys were afraid of me being smart and I guess they must be afraid of you as well. It may be the way you dress or some things you excell at. But regardless, never EVER let this put you down. You are a beautiful person, no matter how many people tell you you're not, because YOU know you're one. I know this may sound silly to you now, but it's the truth. A good excersise that helped me believe this was that whenever you woke up and went to the restroom, I would look myself in the mirror, smile, and said to myself "I'm a beautiful person, both inside and out". Go ahead and try it, I bet to you it will work, just give it time.And to answer your question, yes, you will find someone who will love you and adore you and not every guy go for looks. Maybe guys at your age (even older guys do this) but the trick is to spot the ones who don't and those will not screw you over.Good luck and please do the excersise I told you. It will work!
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A
male
reader, ChiRaven +, writes (11 July 2008):
 Trite but there: there's somebody for everybody. You WILL find the right person for you, if you maintain a positive outlook. That's important because if you sit around moping about how you're never going to have anyone, chances are you won't.
Don't fret over it right now. And no, not all guys go for looks. One of the greatest "beauties" in history, Egyptian Queen Cleopatra, was not even as good as average looking, yet she managed to acquire, as lovers, several of the most important men in the world in her time. And you'll find that a lot of the more fun and interesting guys you'll eventually meet will be interested in things besides looks as well. You're at an age now when guys often fixate on superficial things. Don't worry ... most of them, the ones worth having, will grow out of that stage pretty soon.
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 July 2008): Well when you get older and boys start to get less shallow and more mature thats when you'll shine above the rest.
If its bothering you, chat to boys online. They won't be able to see you and you'll be able to talk to them confidentally on there.
Don't worry about your looks. Boyfriends aren't everything, and I'm sure you really aren't as bad as your making out.
There are boys out there! - I'm not advertising myself, but there are boys out there who will prefer personality over looks. If your 13 years old, then unfortunatley the number of them is limited, but as you get older you'll realize boys get more mature.
Read other peoples comments, sorry I can't be of more help and support.
*CJ-Gecko!*
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