A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hello all, I think I may be pregnant. The issue I would like to ask you all about it how to talk to my boyfriend about it. First off, should I tell him right away before I know for sure? Or should I wait until I do know, and then tell him? I feel like I need to talk to him about it even though I'm not 100% sure, but I don't want to worried him if it's a false alarm. Secondly, if I am pregnant, how should I tell him? Communication is not my strong suit, and I always get really anxious over bringing up tough issues. My boyfriend is the kindest, more supportive man I have ever been with, and we love each other a great deal, but this would obviously be a big deal, and I am sort of scared!Thank you all for your advice!
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female
reader, babyparis +, writes (29 January 2012):
 I would sit down and talk to him. Let him know whats going on so you guys can discuss how you want to handle things etc... You should also take a hpt to see if you are. Ask him do he want to be there while you take it, well wait for the results, lol. Then go to the clinic for the rest if you are...
I hope everything turns out how you want it!.
A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (29 January 2012):
 Your age range is 18-21, so I didn't know how old you were. I always include the bit about birth control. You'd be surprised at how many young adults are misinformed about proper birth control.
Have you even missed a period?
Anyways, in my answer I did tell you how to communicate with him. You also said in your post you didn't want to worry your boyfriend. So IMO, it's best to confirm whether you are or not first, before making a big deal out of something that could very well be nothing.
HOWEVER, if you want to talk to him (which it seems that way from the follow-up) then buy a pregnancy test and tell him you need to meet up with him in person. Show him the box and tell him you may be pregnant.
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A
female
reader, EBM2008 +, writes (29 January 2012):
 I would go ahead and hit up a clinic and get a blood test. At your age (and mine, even) periods can be out of whack, and you don't want to freak out your guy for nothing. Tell him you think you may be pregnant, and have him go with you to get tested. It's more accurate than the at-home tests, and I had one for $30USD at Planned Parenthood (without insurance). Other places do them completely free. It's a bit of a relationship turning point, because it's a good way to see how you're doing as far as long-term potential--does he have the same views as you about responsibility, etc.
Communication is not your strong suit? There's no way around it. You need to be open and honest if you want a successful relationship. Do yourself a favor and make sure to be ultra careful when having sex.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for the quick response.
I am 21 and by boyfriend is 26, so the issues doesn't really concern our parents at this point. I am on birth control, but sometimes things just happen. I do appreciate your advice, but honestly, I'm not looking for a lecture on birth control. I'm looking for advice about communication.
Is it really wrong to discuss something with him that I am concerned about? Isn't that an important part of a relationship?
Anyways, I did ask advice not to hear what I wanted to hear, but to hear others' opinions, so thank you.
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (29 January 2012):
FIRST and foremost, take a pregnancy TEST before you go talking to your boyfriend about this. There's NO need to make a big deal out of this if you aren't pregnant at all. Save yourself and your boyfriend the worry and hassle.
IF you have a positive pregnancy test, ring the doctor for a blood test to get it officially confirmed.
Then tell your boyfriend face to face, even bring the positive stick to show him if you don't know how to form the words. Let him ask questions, listen. You two need to decide what you're going to do regarding the pregnancy.
After you've come to a decision then you both need to speak to your parents.
IF you are NOT pregnant, then take this pregnancy scare as a lesson. Get yourself on a proper form of birth control such as the pill, Depo shot, or implants. Your boyfriend also needs to be wearing condoms for extra precaution.
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