A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hey everyone quite a dilema here. sorry its so long. im a single mum of 2 kids no dad on the scene . I bought a house years ago . Most of the houses around me are rented including the ones behind me ( these are attached aka back to back ) the house behind me went up for sale a year ago and not long after a couple moved in . at first all i heard from them was shouting arguing and door slamming this was going on most of the day and sometimes at night . i didnt go round as i dont want to get involved even tho it sometimes kept us awake . A few month ago my kids were asleep early ( school night ) and suddenly the man from behind came round and told me to stop banging . we wasnt banging and i told him my kids were asleep and the banging wasnt from us , he then got in a threatening manner pointing at me telling me to stop banging and to tell tell the kids to stop banging to which i said theyre asleep and not banging he told me he was being nice this once and then he left . a week later my nephew came to call ( young teen ) i wasnt in and the man from behind me slowly drove past shouted out the window stop banging or ill come back round and sort you out . My nephew was worried and phoned me to which i hurried home but this guy had gone. The main problem is this man smokes a lot of drugs . Its so strong it seeps through the walls . No-one around where i am dare report or say anything . As far as i am aware he owns the house . I dont know what to do . i reported anonymously online to police and environmental health but nothing seems to come of it . hes not one that can be approached and asked nicely. the stench has been going on for a year its so sickly i feel sick most of the time . i cant afford to move ,i dont have anyone to turn to for help and police do nothing even tho its illegal to have drugs , what can i do ?
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (15 March 2017):
 What a horrible situation that you are in. Unfortunately unless enough off the neighbors complain and make it known who it is that is complaining then the police are not going to do anything. Keep record off the times he comes to your door and keep on to the police, also call the social workers and tell them your worries about your children and see what they can do.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 March 2017): If you keep reporting anonymously to the police they are very limited to what they can do. Without knowing your details it's impossible for them to risk assess the situation. There is lots police can do with nightmare neighbours causing harassment, alarm or distress to you - before you even take into account the illegal drugs. Initially the police wouldn't go around and say "oh the lady with the kids behind called us in" but there may come a time you will have to provide a statement to use as evidence of his behaviour and actions, and for your own and your children's safety I would recommend going to the police.A few years ago in the UK a woman ended up committing suicide after also killing her disabled child because her neighbours harassed her so much she couldn't handle it any more. Such a tragic, tragic situation but it led to the police having much more powers in situations where neighbours target another neighbour. I would buy a cheap cctv camera - pretty sure even Groupon and wowcher do deals, and put it up by your front door. Buy a notebook and log dates and exact times you have problems and most of all REPORT EVERYTHING. He might not own the house, try and report him to the local housing association as if he is a tenant then they will also have to take repoetc seriously. The police would contact housing association anyway once you start reporting but it doesn't do any harm to repeatedly report. You say yourself you can't afford to move, you also deserve better than being terrified in your own home. I would report continuously to the police, state you are alone with 2 children and feel vulnerable and unsafe and given he does drugs you also feel unsafe about the people visiting his address. Perhaps you get on with your neighbours either side of you? Tell them you are going to be reporting him and encourage them to do the same (as long as they don't get along with him). You can't live your life frightened and potentially your only other solution is to go and rent somewhere and put your house up for someone to rent from you - if you can't afford at all to sell up and move.If at any time you think he's dangerous and makes threats to you or anyone at your home then ring 999. People can't think it's alright to get away with behaving like that, and I feel so sorry you're in that situation. Please start reporting him to the police - or pack up, go stay with your parents and get the house up for sale.
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A
male
reader, Denizen +, writes (6 March 2017):
 Do you have any male friends? Why not get a couple of them to go round and talk to the man? He might think it is easy to bully a woman, but if he knows there could be consequences then he might think differently.
If the guy is a stoner he won't be much of a threat. However if he has developed some psychosis then you will need to involve the police and possibly a doctor.
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious +, writes (6 March 2017):
 What a dreadful situation.
Given that he has threatened you, I would make a formal report to police so that there is something on record if this situation escalates and he actually hurts you.
If he is smoking as much as you say, it is unlikely he can afford a mortgage. If by some chance he HAS managed to obtain one, he will probably fall into arrears and have the house repossessed. It is far more likely that the house is rented. There is some way of finding out who owns property but I would have to look this up as I can't remember how you find out (might be the Land Registry?).
Is there any way you can insulate your house to minimize the smell from his house?
HUGS.
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A
female
reader, Campari Milano +, writes (6 March 2017):
I am really sorry, but if this man is as aggressive as you make him out to be, there is nothing you can do except keep complaining to the police, or move house.
You don't need to complain anonymously. If you explain your concerns the police will keep your name out of it.
The key factor in this situation is your safety and the safety of your children. If you explain to the police that he has demonstrated threatening behaviour towards you all, but that you don't want to be named, and could they check for drugs as the reason for the visit, they should understand.
If they continue to be ineffective, move house!
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