A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:My wife wants a threesome with another man. She says she loves the idea of "spit-roasting." I am disgusted, when I first met her two years ago in Church she was innocent and caring, and she saved herself until our wedding night. I don't know where she's getting these kinky ideas from but I don't like it, what if she's met a more expierienced man who's showing her these things? How should I confront her?
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threesome, wedding, wedding night Reply to this Question
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female
reader, maine +, writes (26 February 2011):
I would not do the threesome because my brother and his ex wife had one and there marrage is over because of it.
A
female
reader, Araelia V  +, writes (1 December 2009):
 BUY THE KARMA SUTRA
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A
female
reader, Carrot2000 +, writes (27 November 2009):
 Tell her the threesome is out of the question. Then buy a sex book with different positions you can try out to keep your sex life hot.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (25 November 2009):
I think that being a innocent good girl has finally worn off, and she now has fantasies. Don't be too hard on her yet. I think you need to sit down with her and ask her why she's suddenly feeling this way, and if she's happy with the marriage. Start talking to her, and hopefuly she'll open up. Don't accuse her of cheating, you don't know if she has. And also make it clear you will not have a threesome and that's it. It could just be a fantasy from nowhere. So talk to her and see how happy she is, and see if there are any reasonable ways to spice up your love life.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2009): That is absolutely strange. As a female I find it almost insulting that she would *want* that. Its completely chauvinistic and derogatory towards woman!
Nevertheless, sometimes things like that just happen. Maybe she got an idea from a co-worker or friend to start watching porn (or maybe she started on her own) and likes the "submissive female" role.
Rather than be mean, or disgusted at her, try to talk with her. Thank her for telling you how she feels and opening up. If she insists she wants it, then try to incorporate the act into your sexual practices without actually having another man there. As a couple it's important to fill each other's needs.
Ad far as her having another man, the odds say no. If another man was teaching this to her, she wouldn't be so open and honest about her wants to you. She'd just get them from him and not tell you.
I hope everything works out!
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A
female
reader, sammi star +, writes (25 November 2009):
 I doubt it has anything to do with her meeting a new, more experienced man. If that were the case then she'd be wanting to try these things with him, but she's spoken to you about it right?
It usually takes a lot of courage for people to speak up about their fantasies and sexual desires, especially if, like you say, this is kinda out of character for her.
Why are you so disgusted? I really hope you didn't let your wife see that that's what you felt or she's gonna be pretty reluctant to open up to you about what she wants in future! Don't make her feel bad for this.
But, it's obviously not something you're going to be willng to try so let her know that, neither of you should have to try things you're uncomfortable with but you might find that her honesty opens up new doors for you both and you can both be open about what you want and discuss trying new things that you can enjoy together.
Good luck!
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A
female
reader, shortone1 +, writes (25 November 2009):
 that would be hard to kope with. knowing im a married women and i would never think of doing such a thing. i would sit her down and tell her kindly and understandingly that you are uncomfortable with her idea, and that it would be considered cheating and definently would be out of the picture because a marriage is sacred between a man and women. maybe it sounds like she wants more excitment, so you two should talk first about what it is she could be feeling she wants and come to an agreement that there is another way to make her happy as well as makeing you feel comfortable so maybe going together to a porn place that sells toys and such maybe the solution. i really don't know but first thing is first is telling her how you feel nicely and openly. hoped i could help
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