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My wife says she won't move out of the house until our divorce is final. Why?

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Question - (3 November 2017) 9 Answers - (Newest, 6 November 2017)
A male United States age , anonymous writes:

My wife says she's not moving out until our divorce is final. She says she talked to a lawyer. Why wouldn't she just move? She has a home to go to that she bought recently with daughter

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A female reader, femmenoir Australia +, writes (6 November 2017):

femmenoir agony auntAsk her directly.

It appears that she's not going anywhere, because she's awaiting her half of all assets.

She'd get whatever she brought into the relationship/marriage and whatever else you guys bought together.

As hard as it is, she has this right and just as much right to stay within the house as you do.

After all, when you were both pre-divorce married, the house belonged to both of you and technically it still does, UNLESS you bought the house and paid for everything and this can be proven.

If not, then she can stay until your divorce is final.

Even if you did buy the house and everything else, there are still rules that apply upon divorce, because you got married.

You may still have to split all assets, as she contributed in various ways during the marriage, both materially and non-materially.

It's an awful situation to be in, however, unfortunately, this is a divorce and no divorce is ever easy.

Whichever way you go, aim to keep things as calm and as peaceful as possible and spare yourselves any ongoing quarrels/stress.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (5 November 2017):

Honeypie agony auntIf you read my links, OP You will see that if EITHER of you moves out while separated the person MOVING can lose a significant amount of the worth of the house.

If it's a rental, then I have to wonder why. But if you two OWN that house together the LAW states that moving out means you are "entitled" to a smaller portion. She OBVIOUSLY wants half.

You COULD talk to YOUR lawyer and find a way to BUY her out.

It's a stupid law if you ask me. For both parties.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (4 November 2017):

Why would a judge order a woman out of a home she own s half of billy Bathgate ? That's is extremely sexist . It's just as likely the judge could order HIM out ! She had as much right as him to be there

In fact it's a wise move to stay in the home because she can be compromising her financial position to leave before it's sold . She's staying because it's a smart strategic move . Why are you staying OP . Surely you have a friend or relative you could stay with if it's bothers you so much ?

See ! The same answer you give will be exactly her reasons . Because it's a smart financial and legal move

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A male reader, Billy Bathgate United States +, writes (4 November 2017):

Because: she knows it makes you angry, her mouthpiece told her not to leave until the divorce is final, she is having trouble letting go. It could be any of those reasons or a combination or none of them. Have you asked her?

If you can’t get a judge to order her out, highly unlikely you may have to resign yourself to putting up with her until the divorce is final.

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A female reader, CindyCares Italy +, writes (4 November 2017):

CindyCares agony aunt Because her lawyer advised her against moving, I suppose. Now, which is the reason of this advise.... you should ask her lawyer !

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A reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2017):

You should be talking to your divorce attorney!

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2017):

Not my daughter. hers' by previous marriage. been together 11 years

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (3 November 2017):

Honeypie agony auntBecause if she moves out, she might not get 50% (or whatever amount she is "entitled" to).

You should ask YOUR lawyer what rules apply.

http://www.mainlinedivorcemediator.com/healthy-divorce-blog/top-4-questions-about-moving-out-separation-divorce-in-pa

https://mensdivorce.com/moving-before-divorce-final-problems/

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/joseph-e-cordell/moving-out-after-divorce_b_5510895.html

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A female reader, Youcannotbeserious United Kingdom +, writes (3 November 2017):

Youcannotbeserious agony auntHow long have you two been together? I am assuming quite a while if she has an adult daughter. Is she entitled to half the house when you divorce? Perhaps she is protecting her asset? Or perhaps she doesn't really want a divorce and is still hoping to save your marriage? Or perhaps she is just trying to annoy you and make a point that she will leave when SHE is ready to leave.

We can only GUESS at why she is doing this as you have given no information to go off. YOU are in a better position to judge why she is doing this. If you cannot figure it out, why not simply ASK her the question?

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