A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I spent a couple hours getting ready before going over to my boyfriend's house. I showered, did my hair and make up, and put on perfume. After I got there, we sat in the living room and he said, "Can I say something kind of weird?" And I said of course, and he said "You kind of smell like c**. Or like sex." I didn't even know what to say to that, because there was no possible way I would smell like that since I had showered and hadn't been with anyone. I felt really weird afterwards and didn't even want to hang out anymore. Then he said "it's just a question", as if I were silly for having been offended. Is this a weird thing to say? He seems a bit insecure sometimes. He likes to know what I've been doing all the time and although he accepts that I have them-- he doesn't exactly like my male friends. I like to go drinking with a group of friends sometimes and I can tell he gets nervous about it. Once I had a bruise on my arm and he said "Are you seeing someone else? Because I didn't give that to you". Right now I am listing all the weird things he does, but we have a good relationship for the most part. He looks out for me and is a good listener. He's not abusive at all, but gets suspicious that I'm seeing someone else every couple weeks it seems like.It's hard for me to pinpoint what my question is... is my boyfriend possessive in a way that is weirder than normal? I felt really insulted when he told me I smelled like c**, because it's like he's implying I let some random guy jerk off on me or something. I just don't know what to make of this.
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female
reader, Anonymous 123 +, writes (5 May 2012):
Well your boyfriend smells of trouble, I can tell you that.
He might be a good listener and he's not abusive and all that, but the fact that he said the things that he did, it screams of insecurity. He doubts you, there's no question about that. He doesnt have anything to validate his doubts but he voices his doubts all the same. I would be very wary of this guy.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 May 2012): I'm not going to answer about the possessive boyfriend (the other Aunts will definately give you better advice than me on this) but regarding the "smell":
-sometimes we don't wash properly
-sometimes when we are soooo in tune with a guy we ooze out a sex scent (do not mistake this with his c**** word ) we start "overflowing" if you get my meaning.
...its all those hormones raging.
-having your period? That scent lingers, especially when you start "experimenting"
Oh and btw your boyfriend is an idiot!
LoveGirl
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A
female
reader, Latti +, writes (5 May 2012):
Okay....you need to have a little conversation with him and it should go something like this:
Something is bothering me and I need to get it off my chest. The other day when you said I smelled like c** or like sex. I was in disbelief that you would say something that fucked up and stupid! You think that little of me! Oh...I guess you think, I would just screw some guy and then come over and sit on your sofa?? Are you that insecure??? Well its obvious...you don't like my perfume...and I can make sure you never smell it again. I don't have to come around! Don't ever disrespect me like that again.
Coke or pepsi?? Then smile!!!
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A
male
reader, JustHelpinAgain +, writes (5 May 2012):
Young guys can be incredibly insecure and mistrusting (and not always without reason) but this sounds way out of line. He is looking for your reaction and the best thing you could have done, or should do next time, is tell him that is not a nice thing to say and put him straight on whatever his insecurity is. Don't be afraid to ask him straight to his face what his issue is. Do it nicely but definately avoid the wierd psycho stuff that guys can use to manipulate their partner.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 May 2012): Ok first of that very random of him u should ask him if he's cheating and that's y he says u do and tell him that's very disrespectful and if he's wondering if u cheat he could ask but not in that kind of a way and I can't beleave he would say that I would of smacked him wand went home well best of luck 2 u and I do thing u need to. Take care of this asap
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A
female
reader, janniepeg +, writes (5 May 2012):
He didn't know he was being disrespectful. Do not let this behavior continue. Tell him you do not want to answer his questions and when he makes comments about guys doing this go you just go home. Only visit him again when he promises not to do this to you again.
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