A
female
age
30-35,
*rastic knowledge
writes:i need advise really bad well my bf of almost 2 years had been hiding something from me for about 7 months and last night he fianlly admited that he faked phone sex with his ex girl friend, but we were not together and let me tell you why this is hurting me so much. My 21 year old bf acts as hes mother can controll him for ever and well she hates me so he told her he left me and started trying to keep me and him a secretWell hes ex is with a friend of hes step fathers, me and him went thru alot the last year and alot of fights, i lost a baby when i was 5 months along and went thru a d and c alone. They started talking as friends which bugged me as i knew her before him and i didnt know they were ever together intill me him already got together and she wouldnt stop calling him telling him i am no good, cheating alot other aweful things.Well they got really close flirting in text messages and he would call her when i thought he couldnt even call me but i forwarded her a text message from hes phone him saying i love you tiffany which is my name and she got upset so he told her i stole hes phone and did it and im being a bitch about it then he left me and it hurt so bad when he did leave me and i felt as he left me for her because they got even closer and closer then me and him ended up getting back together but now i feel as me and him got back together bacause they stopped being friends. (take a breath now)She tried to be my friend after telling me they had phone sex were together and all this before me and him broke up. He says that he talked dirty knowing she was masterbating and told her he was cumming so he didnt have to fake it anymore as he was messing with her and didnt know what to do when she really started touching her self but i dont know what to do about this it doesnt sound right and i dont even know if i believe anymore.Our relationship before he told me yesterday was great the past few months i still love him but im kinda lost in if he loved me than why did he leave me for her and why if she isnt as beautiful to him as he says i am.I need help i cant get past this. I want to move on but the hurt from this makes me want to leave him and not look back.please help me where do i go from here? do i move on? am i wrong to be hurt? I feel as he cheated on me emotionally with the sexual flirting while we were together and i feel he left me for hes ex then when she was done he ran to me. Im cry my self to sleep at night and i cant help but be a bit distant from him
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broke up, cheated on me, flirt, got back together, his ex, I love you, move on, phone sex, text Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Andy00  +, writes (13 October 2007):
 Give it time. Soon you will realize that this guy is not worth getting upset over. I understand that you probably are right now, but in the future you will find somebody worthy of your trust, and will love and respect you like every guy should, unlike the scumbag that is your ex. He does not deserve you. Keep telling yourself that, because it's absolutely true. Right now maybe you want him to have you, but those feeling will soon fade, once it sinks into you that he simply is not worth your time.
A
female
reader, Another One +, writes (13 October 2007):
 Hi, girl! My advice to you is focus...focus on developing yourself as a person. You said "My man cheated on me..." Is he really a man? Doesn't seem like it. You need to focus on not having a close relationship with this "man" or the other girl, either. Educate yourself. Focus on school work. If you're out of school, go back. Seek friends who will help you stay away from these people. They are not good for you. It seems like they are doing stupid things for lack of sense or anything better to do. Is there any one who can help you in your town? A relative, a pastor? Take control of your life. You are not wrong to be hurt, this is normal because you care. But be careful who you care about. Care about yourself most of all now... you need to. Instead of crying yourself to sleep each night, talk to a friend or a parent or relative. Make plans for the future.
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A
female
reader, leanne.od +, writes (13 October 2007):
 He's not worth your tears and upset. he is a prick and needs to be out in his place. he didn't give a toss about your feelings when he was flirting with this other girl.
men are crap and treat us like shit and then expect us to be there when they come running because they realise that actually, the grass isn't greener on the other side but we let them.
stop being a door mat, don't get over it for him, get over for yourself.
you're young and have the whole of your life to find mr right. have fun and take care.
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A
female
reader, Lila +, writes (13 October 2007):
 For starters any man that would leave you alone through a miscarriage and a d&c is not a man. He sounds like a baby and a coward,he's scared of his mom,he screws you over,isn't honest with you or his ex. Don't be friends with him or her. There are plenty of real men out there that are emotional advable and stable you will find one,don't give up. I'm sorry about your loss and horrible relationship.
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