A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Recently, I was cheated on by my girlfriend. I loved her so much and trusted her alot too, but she proved to be contrary to what I thought of her. Do you think I will find another girl whom I will love and trust? The problem is that I have totally lost the trust. Can I regain this trust, and will I find another love?I would like your advice on this.ThanksP.S: I am a handsome guy, well educated, and I have a good postion in my work place with a decent salary.
View related questions:
cheated on me Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks dear11,
hopefully will not commit another mistake in future and will be precise in selecting the right person.
best regards
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionyes dear i will do like that. i wont rush at all. that relationship has learnt me lots of things. now i have got much experience in knowing the right person hopefully.
thanks for taking ur time.
best regards
...............................
A
male
reader, Capri2  +, writes (15 February 2011):
All right, put your energies into your future. Move on, but avoid rushing up into a new relationship. Take it easy.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questiondear capri,
u r very right dear. these days i am passing through very hard days of my life. coz i rejected the one i loved and i had to move on as i would never ever forget her past. it was teasing me all the time and will tease me in future as well.
i sent her an email just minutes before, telling her that "i have no love, no affection, no feelings for u, plz dont contact me onwards. our relationship has ended long before and i wonder y do u still contact and sending me emails."
...............................
A
male
reader, Capri2 +, writes (15 February 2011):
Cheating is no only a physical thing. She spent 10 days in a tour with her ex. If she knew her ex would be there, that is a kind of cheating. I guess.
Maybe she ended up realizing that she did wrong. That could explain the email. But I guess moving on is the best for both of you. She can start a new relationship without doing such mistakes.
As for you, I guess that you can learn something from this for your next relationship. You won't get hurt so easy the next time.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questiondear capri2, JDinCali and brother who hasn't written his name, thanks alot for ur words, these are really appreciated by me. u very rightly said capri, that most ppl cheats but not all, JDinCali u rightly said that It's for the best, because someone that doesn't respect us isn't worth our time and we should find honest woman with better virtue and self control.... you know how she cheated on me, i dont know how u consider it, cheat or not, but i say it cheating.. she went to tour with a guy whom she loved before and stayed for 10 days with him an a hotel, she says that she did nothing wrong with him, but being with him for few days really hurt me alot, but i forgave her but one day again she sent me an sms telling me "i couldnt get my love (that boy whom she went with him on tour) but i want u (me) get ur love, coz i can understand what is pain in love, when u get me i will think i got what i wanted". that really hurt me and i got that she was only telling me lie she loved me, everything came clear in her sms. i broke up with her 2 months ago, but u know she yesterday after 2 months no contact, sent me a long email telling me that she loves me alot and everyday crying for me and wanted me to forgave her past mistakes, but i have gone to a stage where retreat is much diffucult, my heart is full of hate for her, i know if i make up with her again will be same problem... ur advice on this will also be much appreciated. thanks
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2011): A broken heart takes time to heal but heal it will, in time. Every time you go through a terrible experience like this you will learn things about yourself and others which will be valuable for the rest of your life. Also, you will appreciate that wonderful woman in your future(trust me most women are very wonderful)so much more after this experience.
...............................
A
female
reader, JDinCali  +, writes (14 February 2011):
 I feel your pain, a lot of us do. Your ex-girlfriend cheated because, she was insecure about something. Now, whether that "something" was due to issues in your relationship or from deep down in her heart...never mind her "issues" they are hers and she chose not to involve you with mending. So, she's moved on. It's for the best, because someone that doesn't respect you enough to tell you how they feel isn't worth your time. You deserve an honest woman with better virtue and self control. Chin up hon, you know you're a good man and confidence is sexy. Give your self some love by doing things you love and in no time you'll find another woman....maybe a lucky one! Trust is inevitable. Be well. :)
...............................
A
male
reader, Capri2 +, writes (13 February 2011):
You have to keep two thing in mind. A lot of people cheat, what doesn't mean that every people cheat.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all, each one of you had a piece of good advice inside your statements.The strong point of The realist is that I can bring what I learned in one relationship to the next, but in the end I have to know that each new relationship is a new beginning for me.In Esme the thing I liked is that I will find someone else. Who knows when? And enjoy being with myself for the moment.In Aunt honesty the statement I liked the most is "Most girls wouldn't even dream of cheating in a relationship". That creates a kind of hope in heart, that they all can't be the same.I also thank dear 11 and Capri2 for their kind advice, but dear 11 says one sided love, which mine wasn't one sided, and capri2 puts less hope in his statement which he is much right, but it doesn't take me away from that despair state. However he is very much true what he said. Thank you all for taking your time. I know it is difficult to have another love and trust her the same, but nothing is beyond hope, I am still young energetic and can hope for good. Thank you so much once again...
...............................
A
male
reader, The Realist  +, writes (12 February 2011):
 What you have to remember is that she cheated on you and you don't trust her. This doen't apply to any other girl you meet. She has no effect on them. When you realize that you should be able to have a healthy relationship with a new girl.
You can bring what you learned in one relationship to the next but in the end you have to know that each new relationship is a new beginning for you.
...............................
A
female
reader, Esme7655 +, writes (12 February 2011):
Everyone gets played at one time or another, sorry, she messed you up! But She's not worth your time & thoughts. you will find someone else. Who knows when? Enjoy being with yourself for the moment.
And don't let her skew your thoughts on love. It's awesome to fall in love! It's amazing when you find that one person to commit to, whether it turns out to be a month, 2 years or 50. Just relax have fun, meeting new people, or reacquainting yourself with old friends :)
...............................
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (12 February 2011):
 Ok well obviously you are going to be very upset and angry at your girlfriend for doing this. Obviously she was not to be trusted but this is not your fault. I understand at the moment that you are hurting and your trust in women is gone at the moment. But you need to remember not all women are going to cheat on you. Most wouldnt dream off cheating in a relationship. But i guess sometimes in life we have to go through a few rocky relationships to find our perfect partner. What she done on you is wrong but dont let this stop you from finding love again.
Am sure in time your heart will heal and you will learn to trust a girl again. As long as you dont compare her to your ex girlfriend you should be ok. Just remember to take some time out on your own to let your heart heal. Goodluck Sweetie.
...............................
A
male
reader, Capri2 +, writes (12 February 2011):
I don't get your PS, really.
About the trust, you will hardly trust any other woman like you trusted your girlfriend. Anyway your only chance is to start trusting someone, a little at least. There is no other way to get into a relationship.
...............................
|
