A
female
age
36-40,
*uscle and Sinew
writes:I am officially 3 months pregnant!! I have been thinking of names... The only problem is that my husband is set on the name Zoe, which i love, but i know he wants that name because his mother had picked that name for her baby that she miscarried a long time ago. I wouldnt feel comfortable naming our child that, because we arent in good terms with his mother, and i dont know if i would want to name our child on behalf of a child that passed away. And i know i will regret naming my child that. Any advice? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (8 January 2013):
 Congratulation on your new baby :)
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2013): Congratulations on your new baby boy and thanks for the update. I wish you all long, happy lives.
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A
female
reader, Muscle and Sinew +, writes (8 January 2013):
Muscle and Sinew is verified as being by the original poster of the question Sorry for the long wait. But we had a boy!! So no worries!! Thank y'all for your advise. I really appreciate it. Such a touchy subject for my husband, but he understood.
M&S
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A
female
reader, babyparis +, writes (28 January 2012):
 i would use it for the middle name or a nickname...
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 January 2012): I think both are good reasons not to name your child this name, for a first or even a middle name. A name should have happy associations. Naming your child after a miscarriage is bad luck imo. Tell him no to this name and give him first choice on another maybe.
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A
female
reader, Usagi  +, writes (10 January 2012):
 i like the middle name idea too... and i think you are right to feel uncomfortable... in my country at least, it is considered a death wish to name a baby after a dead baby... so if i was in your place i would never agree with it even though i don't really believe in superstitions. talk him into comprimising for middle name Zoe, and put some names on the table for a first name.
good luck to you and your child :) i wish you to bring a healthy little treasure to the world and have a happy family :)
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (10 January 2012):
Either use it as her middle name if you have a girl, and YOU pick her first name.
Or you tell your husband, I'm not sure about Zoe, nothing about naming a baby is usually set in stones. My middle girl was an Elizabeth til the week before she was born, I had a odd dream, where she (the baby) said he hated the name lol - so we changed it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 January 2012): Pray for a boy hehe. Just compromise, make Zoe her middle name. Not a double barrelled name like Mary-Zoe, but a silent middle name that's not used.
That way you get to choose a name you both like and his wish to memorialise the miscarriage will be satisfied.
You'll barely even hear Zoe but it will still be part of her name. Just make sure not to double barrel it.
OP tell him your reasons but just remember not being on good terms with his mother is not a good reason. Naming your child after a miscarriage is something that makes you uncomfortable, I too would be very uncomfortable with that, it has to be a name you both like. You simply cannot have a child where one of you hates their name. That just makes no sense.
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A
male
reader, Dodds  +, writes (10 January 2012):
 Talk to him candidly explaining how you feel about it, and more importantly why you feel that way. As his wife you should get first priority when it comes to such matters.
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