A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:My husband cannot have children and he has asked me to consider sleeping with another man to have children. Problem is i do not want to sleep with another man just to have children. Plus i feel it will have a bad effect on our relationship. i feel it will be strained. i got married to him and swore to stick it out wth him....what say you? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 February 2016): We are in the same position I've got very low sperm count and poor quality.its not a decision we've taken lightly we've asked a fertile family friend for donation. From my perspective I would rather this than unknown donor.the reasons I want the child to be mine no worrying about stumbling across the fact we had used unkown sperm the reason for this are many first my wife and I chose each other to start a family.
What if the child needed medical help in the future we know all his family
He has a family and all happy and health
I don't see the conception as sex I see it as a procedure the way nature intended.granted there might be some unavoidable pleasure that's not a problem to me cause pregnancy and birth isn't an easy ride .she isn't been unfaithful it's helping to. Expand our family for which I'm so great flu she's willing to do this and can't thank my friend enough we set some ground rules . My wife has had a bigger problem with idea than me but all other procedures involve someone impregnating her just a different method
Also we have a lifetime of joy for 10miutes displeasure
I trust my wife she trusts me I know it's not everyone's cup of tea but if we'll informed and thought out I don't see the problem
Plus this was the only way years ago and lots of people alive and happy
This will be our second child and must be honest I don't know if we had gone through this route if we hadn't had him it's an axing experience pregnancy and birth then mind blowing when there born.
I know it's not for everyone but don't scoff at those who choose
A
female
reader, ilovebowsandcherries  +, writes (28 July 2009):
 well as uncle phil said do you just want children or is it both a mutual thing?
if it is a mutual thing then you guys can look at adoption but if it's just one sided and it's your side you may want to have a talk with him and find out how he feels about this and why he's trying to palm you off onto someone else.
Hope this helps :)
x ilovebowsandcherries x
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 July 2009): Which one of you wants children - him, you or both of you? If only one of you wants children it would not be good to have them by whatever means, but if you both want children adoption might be the answer. It would take some of the pressure off Madonna anyway.
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 July 2009): Which one of you is most desperate? Could be you are putting pressure on him by mentioning your longing for kids and as he doesn't want to lose you, is willing to make that sacrifice. Quite an amazing guy if that is true. So accept the no-kid situation and lay off with the pressure. On the other hand, if it is he who is the desperate one, then sorry, as a guy I have no comprehension of what that must feel like(I am a father of 3 btw)and therefore unable to comment.
Good luck
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 July 2009): hi,sorry for having to pass through such a challengig moment.i wunt encourage you to go with your husband's suggestion. and you are correct,it will not be too good for your relationship so my suggestion is you talk to Him about how you feel and make him understand that you love him regardless of him being the way he is. suggest to him other options like adoption.maybe there is a child out there how needs your help n God planned it way that for you to help him/her. pray over the issue n God will surely direct you on what to do,gud luck.
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A
male
reader, JSBach +, writes (28 July 2009):
There is absolutely no need for you to sleep with another man. You can get pregnant using another man's sperm via artificial insemination. Don't confuse artificial insemination, which is relatively simple and cheap, with IVF, which is very expensive.
Talk to your doctor about your options.
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 July 2009): HI, there are other options than you sleeping with another man - you could go for a sperm donor - but that wouldn;t mean having sex with the donor. I suggest the two of you go amd talk things through with a counsellor - so you know how far each of you is willing/comfortable to go in order to have a family.
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