A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I moved into a shared house with 3 girls F, D and S, and I started dating F, whilst I was with her the other girl D slept with my best friend. D was in a relationship with a guy she had been friends with a while Z, however whilst they were together she slept with that friend another 2 more times, then slept with another friend of mine.D and Z split up, a little while later D and I got together at first all this didn't really bother me as being honest... I wasn't really thinking with my head.We have been together a few months now. We get on so well its unbelievable, she is completely into me, supportive and great fun but I hate the fact she has been with my 2 best friends.She said she did it because she was in love with Z but he was not being faithful and was seeing his ex wife who he had a kid with, she summed it up saying she was just attention seeking. She also says she hasn't been this happy in years, I have complete faith she will be faithful to me and will always talk straight, but what I dont understand is if she liked me even a little bit why was she so ridiculously open and keen to my friends when they were about.All this has portrayed her in a not so good light, however if you were to meet her you would think she is lovely and this was way out of character, which makes it bizarre for me also as it doesn't fit with her, is she just lacking in self esteem? Am I third choice?Any help? Any advice at how I can view this so I don't go mental and keep tormenting myself? as apart from this its a really healthy good relationship or is all this messed up and should I knock it on the head before it goes any further? Help!?
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best friend, ex-wife, his ex, moved in, self esteem, split up Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Miamine +, writes (12 September 2010):
 Good luck.. lol.. live in the present, and create your own happiness...
I'm wishing you all the best that life has to offer... I think your decision is great.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 September 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for your replies. All were very helpful as a point to think about and disagree with or to aid me with my call.
This is where I'm at.
It is what it is! Apart from the past I can honestly not say one bad word about her. I have decided to live in the present and man the fuck up about it. I've never been so happy in a relationship as I am with this girl, I'm taking each day at a time, planning nice things to do and just enjoying each other company. I'm going to make the call on how the relationship is based on how our relationship actually is since we have been together.
Thank you all for your comments
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 August 2010): Fantasy: you can get over it. Reality: you won't.
Replace her and save yourself years of unhappiness.
Best friends. Hah.
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A
female
reader, Miamine +, writes (30 August 2010):
You dated F, maybe she feels that she's not your first choice and you prefer the other girl. Maybe she's upset to know you slept with and loved a woman she actually lived with.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (30 August 2010):
Nothing you can do. This is who she is. The only thing you can do is get counselling for yourself, or end it.
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A
female
reader, almc  +, writes (30 August 2010):
You knew this before you two got together, she can't change it now, and you need to let it go!! Its her past, your the guy she is with now and as you say super happy, you must be happy too?!? You need to live with it? Or let her go, because she can't change her past. Good luck
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