A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Haven't heard from my girlfriend in three days, don't know why, we get along real good I thought, she is a busy person with work ,an working out, paladies,her dogs, about five months in the relationship, I treat her like a princess, every one says too nice, I buy her presents, should I be worry, she don't have much time for me, she says take or leave it. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, MSA +, writes (11 December 2015):
 If she wants to be with you, she will be considerate of your needs and feelings and will want to work with you on arranging to spend more time together. This can be done either via more nights together after work or more frequent calls/texts during the day.
If she wants to be with you, she will make time.
Do you have work and a sociallife as well or do you just sit around waiting for her?
A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (10 December 2015):
 I suggest that you "leave it." Sounds like she isn't much in to you.....
Good luck...
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 December 2015): Did she really say "take it or leave it" or did she just honestly say that she only has so much time in her life currently for dating? It is important for both people in a relationship to protect time for their friends and family. Don't you spend time with the guys and with your family??
You probably need to find someone else if that isn't enough for you.
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A
male
reader, no nonsense Aidan  +, writes (10 December 2015):
I’m with Denizen on this. Perhaps it would be nice if she did make some time for your relationship and prioritised you a bit more, but she doesn’t want to, isn’t going to and isn’t going to be persuaded to. She has said very clearly that you have to take it or leave it. That, to her credit, is bluntly honest. Why then are you asking this question? Perhaps you think there’s something you can do to make her re-think. I’m afraid it doesn’t sound like it. Take her at face value when she says take it or leave it. There’s no getting out of the fact that you’ve got an ultimatum. This is clearly not working for you, so I know what I’d do.
I wish you all the very best.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (10 December 2015):
 I guess maybe we should look more into " she has not much time for me ".
In other posts you mention that you meet once a week, sleep over, leave unhurriedly around noon.... that may be not enough to fulfill you, but it may also be honestly the best she can do if she has a full, busy life with work and other engagements .I also think that's at least debatable if a woman should necessarily turn her life around and let go of important stuff like work just because she has been dating for a few months.... Mentioning that just because I feel the woman is coming off as the " bad guy " who takes unfair advantage, while it may simply be a case of two mismatched people with incompatible lifestyles and relational needs.
In any case, I convene that it would not much matter anyway. If she told you " take it or leave it " it means she can't or won't make any changes. Therefore , if you are unhappy with the status quo, the only logical choice is : leave it.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (10 December 2015):
 You are nothing more than a place holder for her.
Mr. You will do until something better comes along....
hence the take it or leave it.
to avoid hurt I suggest leave it.
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A
male
reader, Denizen +, writes (10 December 2015):
 If she says take it or leave it you only have one choice. She clearly doesn't care enough to keep you. Stop the presents. Stop the royal treatment. Find someone who really wants to spend time with you. You are acting like a mug, and she is laughing all the way to her other many interests. You are ranking a poor second to dogs, gym and work. Your friends can see what you cannot. You are treating her too well.
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