| A
age
36-40,
*
writes: Hi,I have this huge issue my girlfriends ex keep hassling her and me saying he wont leave us alone and threatening to kills us...........But this ex was also a friend we expect to get married one day..........me and my girl pls advice on how to deal with him....... Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, patient66  +, writes (7 October 2009):
Go to the police and ask them for some advice on what you can do. Dont fight with him because that can get you in worse trouble. He can charge you if your over 18 for assault. Best to go to the police and explain whats going on so they are aware.
Good luck
A
male
reader, Candleman  +, writes (7 October 2009):
 Self-defense is always good. I would personally look at legal actions that could be taken. I'm not sure about Sri Lanka's laws, but you should inquire to the police or a lawyer to see what your options are.
In the states we have protective orders and what not. Some states you can even tape record what they say in order to use this against them. A phone answering machine is usually good because the person knows that the call is being recorded which will usually be allowed in a court case. Check the laws on taping other people and know your options. Also, any evidence you have of his threats I'm sure would be a good thing to keep in order to prosecute.
A lot of times just the threat of legal action could make the person 'wake up' and realize that he's screwing his whole life up if he continues such actions. I wouldn't go too far w/ the legal issue at first. I would understand what my options are, collect as much evidence as I can and then wait to see if he finally cools off. If not, then proceed with the legals actions.
Understand that a lot of people that threaten like this are only venting their pain and frustration at losing the one they love. As they heal and move on, then the threats stop. Avoiding them as much as possible(especially her in your case) will give them time for the emotions to diminish.
But, you can't underestimate the passions involved. Use extreme caution and if you can legally do so, have a weapon around just in case you will need it for self-defense.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 October 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionIm not a violent guy but this guy is from a powerful family so will have to deal with the after effects also.....
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 October 2009): I suppose you could threaten to kill him too, or tell him you'll get your dad onto him. It's all part of the joys of growing up I'm afraid.
Stand up to him. Get the first punch in - preferably a good one with plenty of leverage right on the end of his nose. You'll be in a much better position to hit him again if he's slightly incapacitated and can't see properly through the tears in his eyes, maybe even follow it up with a kick to the nuts. You'll then be a hero to your girl.
The main thing is to aim very carefully because if you miss he'll have the advantage.
...............................
A
female
reader, kayla20  +, writes (7 October 2009):
 go to the police about harassment change your numbers so he cant get in contact with you
...............................
|
