A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: why is my ex keeping my pictures (our pictures together) on his facebook account and says in relationship with me? He broke up with me 6 months ago. I do not want him to keep my pictures on his profile, I blocked him but can still see his account on search, Should I write to him and ask him to delete my pictures?
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female
reader, YouWish +, writes (27 February 2019):
You could un-tag all of his pictures so that your name and profile don't come up with the pictures he's saved. But the others are correct -- if you had truly blocked him, he wouldn't be coming up in your searches!
Unfortunately, there really isn't anything you can do about the pictures, which are his property, apart from removing your name and identity markers from them. This way as well, people who search for you won't come up with HIS photos of you on their "Pictures of XXXXX" searches.
If I were you, after un-tagging and blocking him, treat the entire issue with indifference, as if he has pictures of hamburgers or something instead. Believe me, he's getting pressure from other friends who are saying "Why don't you change your Facebook? You're not dating XXXXXX anymore! It's kind of creepy to keep that there and depressing to the rest of us to see!". I'm guessing he'll change it on his own without any input from you.
The real issue is YOUR Facebook! If YOUR status is Single, then you're set! New guys will look at YOUR profile, not anyone else's, and if you've un-tagged the pics, they won't see your ex's profile!
A
female
reader, MSA +, writes (26 February 2019):
Question - when was the last time he logged into Facebook? Can very well be that he hasn't logged in for 6 months because he is busy doing other things to help him get over the break up. A lot of times, after break up, people stay away from social media and take time to themselves to heal.
Trust me, he will eventually go back on Facebook and remove his relationship status and possibly all your photos. That time will be when he is fully healed and over your relationship or when he is dating someone new. His new girlfriend will not allow him to have a relationship with you on Facebook.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 February 2019): I am original writer of this question:
I had deleted and deactivated my facebook account right away after break up. one can just enter someone's name in search engine and it comes up.
No, I was not looking at his profile, my friends told me. and no my pictures are not offensive nor bad at all, in fact very beautiful pictures of me and him hugging in Los Angelo, Turkey, Italy Venice, and Paris.
No, it was not an amicable breakup as he was seeing ladies on sex dating sites.
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A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts +, writes (25 February 2019):
Also, for what it’s worth, if a relationship ends neutrally or amicably, it’s not uncommon to leave pictures up to fade into the past. It’s part of his story too, so it’s not major for him to leave them there.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2019): Why do you want the pictures deleted? Are they embarrassing photos? Do you have mutual friends/acquaintenaces, and you don’t want them do see?
If there’s nothing on your end except that you just don’t like it... then leave it alone. Don’t let it bother you and just move on. It’s weirder that you contact him to let him know you’ve been looking and checking up on him.
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious +, writes (24 February 2019):
Could be because he doesn't live his life on Facebook and just hasn't bothered changing anything. Maybe he thinks that short of stuff is really not important in the grander scheme of things. Maybe he is doing it to give you false hope or to annoy you?
The more important question here is, why are you bothered? Stop stalking him. Your relationship is OVER. Let him have what he wants on his account. It is not YOUR problem.
The opposite of love is not hate; it is indifference. Stop checking his account. If someone mentions it, shrug and say you have no idea why he still has photos of you there and that you don't care. Then learn to mean it.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (24 February 2019):
I'd just contact him and ask him to delete them. Then give him a week or two to do so. If he doesn't see if Facebook can help you.
BUT DO stop stalking his social media. It isn't helping you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2019): You can ask him to delete the pictures; but they're his property. They've been published all along. You can submit a complaint to FB security.
Why don't you just block him and forgetaboutit?
He'll meet somebody new, and she'll want to know why you're still on his Facebook?
Let him handle his healing his way; and you handle yours your way. It's the memories, not about you. Why are you wasting time worrying about what he has on his Facebook?
He has no choice but to change his relationships status when he decides to start dating.
In due time, trust me; he'll tire of looking at pictures of you, and delete all images of you on his own. He's still processing the breakup, even though he initiated it.
If you're still aware of what's on his Facebook, you haven't let-go yet either. You're looking for excuses to maintain contact.
Ignore it and maintain the "no contact rule."
Stop stalking him on search. Out of sight out of mind.
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A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts +, writes (24 February 2019):
If you have truly blocked him, you will be unable to find his profile on Facebook without unblocking him.Also, they aren't your photos any more, as they were published on his account. Some people keep them and let them fade into the past, whereas others delete all traces of the other person.As for his status as single or in a relationship with you, he may not have bothered to change it yet, may not have remembered it's there, may not have told others, etc. Not everyone cares what's on Facebook or even remembers what to change/remove if they break up.I'd just chalk it up as part of the experience online and let it go. I'd also suggest actually blocking him, which will not allow you to look at his profile.
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