A
female
age
36-40,
*715
writes:Hi , Iam from India and recently got married it was an arranged marraige , but before marraige i had a boy friend but later part i felt that he is getting things done out of blackmiling me , (he had some photos where we were togather ) and i wanted to break up in that relation but he was so adamant and he doesnt want to break up but all the times he will keep on forcing me even for talking and i basically felt that iam loosing my freedom so i went back to my house resigning my job , my parents never knew abt my relationship and the blackmile ,I asked my boyfriend sometime for marraige and i also told him that i wud like to go with my parents and just went off , for time being i made im beleive that i will be waiting for him , ( but i dont really want to want for him , my intention at that time was like just to go away from him by telling some reason where in he will beleive me as well as he will not blackmile me as well) I went back to my house and fortunately i got married with in 2 months of time ... i was not in contact with him after my marraige but since he knows my email address he is still constantly giving messages like he will kill my family and make me alone and through some of my friends he came to know that i got married and now he is like giving messages like he will find my husband and say the truth and make me alone ..... though am not mailing him or replying to anything but iam still scared that if something goes wrong , and the point is that i didnt say abt this past relationship to my husband , and we settled here in US Our parents ar still there in India iam worried and not getting any ways to come out of it ..... Since he is having the photos and we had sex affair as well he is blackmiling with that still now , can anyone please help me how to come out of it ......
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female
reader, lovelyone3 +, writes (30 June 2010):
 I agree with CaringGuy. Keep all of his e-mails, texts, voicemails - whatever - as proof and call the police. You can also get a restraining order on him, too. We all make mistakes but we learn from them and NO - do not accept being blackmailed by this stupid man.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 June 2010): time to come clean with your hb, tell him about your affair and tell him about the blackmail or else soon your ex will have your naked pics on the internet and you will be the porno star you don't want to be. it starts with being honest with your hb and better your hb finds out about your sexual history from you than from anyone else. if you respect your hb and do not want him to be made a fool then you need to tell him about your lover.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (24 June 2010):
Give him nothing more and go to the police. Immediately. Don't ever accept blackmail, whatever happens. You've already had sex with him, and he's not going away. You need to go to the police. Do not accept blackmail.
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