A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: My boyfriend and I, have been dating for 6 months. We have known each other for over 10 years but never dated. We are intimate and spend almost every night together. However, he doesn't really likes "french kissing". I have suggested and discussed this issue and how important it is for me, but he doesn't seen to understand. The only times he has ever "made out" with me, he has been either drunk or we've just discussed my discomfort about him not kissing me. We never really foreplay neither before nor after sex. I don't know what else to do.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2010): Sorry to ask, but have you considered the cleanliness of your mouth? Are your teeth yellow and stained? What about your breath?I dated a really hot chick with dreadful breath. She suffered from halitosis and the only time I could get past that stench to french kiss her was when we had been drinking. Oddly enough, she had no idea that people smelled her breath from across the room. I read that sometimes it is an enzyme deficiency in saliva that causes the halitosis. I would ask a close friend for an honest opinion on your breath and teeth. You need to ask a friend who will give you a straight answer.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2010): I have the same problem as you only we have been together for 4 years!!!! But ya we do sometimes but only when hes super drunk like you said and he has expressed how much he just doesn't like it. But like you i find it so important for some reason. This may sound lame but its such a passionate moment. Also the foreplay thing is an issue for us too. If they truly dont like it then i dont think theres any way to get them to like it. Maybe hes unsure if hes a good kisser er not and may feel self concious? With the foreplay thing, maybe he just doenst know how to go about it. Maybe if you took initiative on this one and started just kissing him all over his body and stuff like that he will get the hint and follw suit. Or just tell him what really turns you on and that you want him to try this and that and see if hes open to it. Hmmm maybe ill take my own advice haha
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A
female
reader, Lola1 +, writes (24 June 2010):
I don't like french kissing. Maybe soft little love-bites and minimal tongue action, but not all-out french kissing.
I would be more concerned about the disinterest in sex and givong you oral pleasure. If his "bits" seem to respond and work when you orally stimulate him, then it is not a health issue, but could be an emotional one as CaringGuy suggests.
However, after six months, if you are so dissatisfied now, I do not think it will improve.
Sexual compatibility is important in fledgling romances, such as yours is.
Good luck.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2010): I had broken up with him a few times but in the end, "the break up" just doesn't follow through. However, I did tell him this morning that I respected and appreciated his friendship, but that this kind of relationship, doesn't and will not work for me. I said, "that I would respect him more as a man and as a human being, if he would just be honest with me and tell me the reason why". He just apologized for making me "unhappy". He said that it is not his intention to do that and that he was "sorry". I really feel that he cares for me but only as a friend, and not as woman, even though he always says otherwise. I am just very confused and don't know what else to think or do.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (24 June 2010):
He sounds like he's either really repressed, had had some terrible experiences in the past or is a bit too into himself. the fact is, you're not happy with the level of intimacy. You've tried to discuss this with him, and he's still not changed. You now need to ask yourself if you can live like this for the rest of your life. If you can't, then give him the ultimatum. Either he and you are open to more ideas about sex such as foreplay, or you'll have to move on. There's no use in you missing out on fun for the rest of your life when there might be another man out there who's better suited to you.
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