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My crush rejected me but now seems worried about me?

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Question - (1 October 2013) 2 Answers - (Newest, 5 October 2013)
A female United States age 36-40, *mperfectperfect writes:

This time last year I finally came clean and told my crush of 5 years that I liked him. I mentioned a few times we hung out that were special to me. I also told him the reason why I waited - he was dating someone or it never felt right.. after my 30 seconds of courage and feeling like he'd never talk to me again, he replied with a "I bet you feel better and I understand why you waited." My guess - a nicer rejection. So why now tell me to leave my drunk of a boyfriend, take him to court for my kid's sake and he's worried about us.. why even care now? He even goes to liking pictures I post on fb of my kid and no, I don't bash my boyfriend on fb. Please I have better things to post if and when I post. I'm just puzzled. If he doesn't like me then why bother?

View related questions: crush, drunk

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A male reader, no nonsense Aidan United Kingdom +, writes (5 October 2013):

If you want to know why he’s telling you to do these things, just ask him. It’s possible that he likes you to, but like you didn’t do anything about it because he was dating some-one else, you’re not available either. However, if that were the case I suspect he’d have given you more of a clue that there was an interest there, for you to do with what you want.

I think it’s far more likely that he values and cares for you as a friend, and he knows how much you must care for him to make yourself so vulnerable as to open up about your feelings. He feels you are better off out of this relationship.

I think therefore that you need to think about this relationship in its own right. By that I mean don’t factor in to the equation any relationship with your crush when deciding what to do. Think only of whether you and your child are better off with, or without, this boyfriend.

I wish you all the very best.

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A female reader, Rainbowponies United Kingdom +, writes (1 October 2013):

I am sorry that he doesn't feel the same way. I know how tough that is. To me it sounds like he's not interested in you that way but really cares about you as a person. For instance one of my best friends is male. There is no feelings on either side between us but he hates to see guys hurting me and would tell me to get out of a relationship if he didn't think I was happy. He doesn't want to date me, he just wishes me happiness because he loves me in the friendship kind of way.

My advice is to take some space from him if you haven't been able to get over him while you're still friends.

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