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female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: i am a virgin and would love to have sex with my bf and become his child's mom but my bf says that i'm very young to be the mother of his kid and he would make me pregnant only aftr i finish my college but i want it rite now and i have gone mad thinking abt pregnancies and articles about it i cant get it out of my mind what do i do? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2009): i would like to say something to the anonymous female writer who answered on nov 20th.listen here it doesn't mean by reading my question that i don't know to read and write properly fine.and for your kind information having a baby doesn't mean i'm going to discontinue from my studies and not get a proper job.i can manage my studies and get a proper job and make my kid feel proud of me!
A
male
reader, Jim01  +, writes (20 November 2009):
All i had to read was the title and your age to know you are way to young. grow up first!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2009): You are too young, your boyfriend is right, you need to finish your education, and learn how to write better. When you have a baby, there is lots of paperwork and forms to fill in.You may want a baby, but dose a baby want a mother who is poor, without education, and unable to get a job? What do you have to offer a baby, they need more than just money, they need food, clothes, nappies, and they need to feel proud of their mother instead of ashamed of her.
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A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (19 November 2009):
 Call me silly, but should you first get a period (in your sentence) before you have a baby?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2009): Babies do require work. And ou have to be absolutely sure, both of you, that you are going to be able to deal with the exhaustion and life-juggling that will be required to work, school and family in balance.
It is hard, as a teenage parent. But people have done it and done it well. So I'm not saying you shouldn't. I would never presume to know what is best for YOU and your partner.
But if your partner is not keen on the idea, then bring a baby into the mix would not serve to bring you closer, but drive you apart. So consider this as well.
The decision is yours and your boyfriend's, ultimately. You are old enough at 16 to have a general idea of what you want in life and how to get it.
Flynn 24
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2009): I would suggest you babysit for someone's child for a week, unassisted by your parents. This will give you a better feel for what you are asking for...the fantasy in your mind is not reality. Babies are a lot of work and it is exhausting. Plus your boyfriend will be working so much trying to support you that he won't have any time for you or the baby and he will probably resent having his life ruined. That's not even touching what it can do to your body...it will be permanently changed, and not for the better!You are too young to have anyone's baby, enjoy your life while you still can.
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A
female
reader, jkobeska +, writes (18 November 2009):
Wow seriously way tooo young. I'm 25 and I"m too young. Your life after children is not really about you ever again. This is your time your time for partying and lots of boys and fun. Why do you want a child? Do you need to feel loved? What do you think a child will bring to your life? They cry all night they need constant attention. You want to shower or eat dinner too bad the baby comes first. It is not nearly as much fun as it looks trust me. I love my daughter but it is WORK!
Your boyfriend is very bright you do need to finish college before you even think about having a baby and what about getting married you want to do that first as well. For you babies sake not saying anything bad about your boyfriend but you need to be able to support you and your baby if he leaves. You can not depend on anyone your age, sad but true. If you want to travel or go to concerts all that you gotta do before you have a baby.
I with out a doubt gaurentee if you have a baby now you will look back and regret doing it then. You have a baby at 16 you will not finish school thats pretty much a fact as well.
Have you thought about maybe a dog or cat. That is a little more reasonable for someone your age.
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A
female
reader, shell400 +, writes (18 November 2009):
you are way too young to want to have a baby.... sure, plenty of people do it at your age, but usually it is by accident and it sets them back in their life.
i agree with your boyfriend... finish college first, get your life together and then, if you still want it, then have that baby. chances are you probably wont even be with the same guy by the time all of this takes place. (i know, you dont want to hear that)
do yourself and your boyfriend a favor and just focus on have fun right now, focus on what you want for your future and worry about a baby later.
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A
female
reader, dazey  +, writes (18 November 2009):
I actually pity you. Hormones are powerful things. You are lucky your boyfriend has half a clue. It's probably not what your mother would tell you but why don't you start enjoying a sexual relationship before you start thinking about babies?
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A
female
reader, arielbriane +, writes (18 November 2009):
 You have to consider the fact, having a child will be a tough thing, including money, time, and all sorts of stuff. I lost my virginity to my current boyfriend and I think about it constantly, what if I got pregnant? Well, it happens. If you have sex, you have to be ready to think of the consequences. I'd say at the age of 16-17, we may think we're ready but in reality, most of us don't have money to support the baby's needs. I really would LOVE to be a mother right now, I seriously would and I talk to my boyfriend about it all the time, he also wants to be a father. But we both know we're not completely ready.But just because you have sex, it means youre going to have a baby. It doesnt. I got on birth control after I had sex for the first time. Wear condoms, take birth control, and you could possibly get away with having sex without getting pregnant.Honestly, I look up things about pregnancies ALL the time because I want it so bad. Ive even cried because I want a child so bad. Lately, I think about it alllll the time. Its hard, really and I do understand where youre coming from. Maybe its best to wait though.
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A
female
reader, jessica-lea  +, writes (18 November 2009):
 Hi,
the only way to conclude this problem is to disucss it with your boyfriend more thoroughly, you need to be able to understand where each of you are coming from and discuss both sides of the argument before you decide what you are going to do.
I'm sure that if you discuss this with your boyfriend into more detail and get what you want off you chest then you will both feel better.
I am not going to decide for you, but you both can, together.
hope this helps.
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