A
female
age
41-50,
*ovedup08
writes:Hi, I know this question has been asked a couple of times b4 but thought I Would put it in my own way.I Found Out I was 11 weeks Pregnant with My Second Child last week. Its Kind Of a difficult situation as my "boyfriend" Is still with someone else. His plannin on leaving her. ( Which I Know He Will Do When The Time Is Right )To Start with he freaked out big style and said that the best thing to do would be to terminate it as it was not the right time. I did see it from his point of view but when it came down to it i relized I would not be able to go through with it. I told him so and know he just doesnt mention the Baby in anyway.I was hoping someone would be able to tell me how to deal with this. I am more than willing to bring this child up on my own as I did with my first child after leaving his father when he was 6 month old, his now 4. but last night he sent me a text saying whatever happened he will always love the three of us, does that mean his coming round to the idea? how can i approach the subject without him freaking out again?I Would not be able to have an abortion as i know i would regret it big time.Any Advice is greatfully accepted.
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male
reader, NITRAM BLUE  +, writes (3 January 2009):
 "I am more than willing to bring this child up on my own as I did with my first child after leaving his father when he was 6 month old, his now 4. but last night he sent me a text saying whatever happened he will always love the three of us, does that mean his coming round to the idea?"
Not conclusive but keep your fingers crossed.
"how can i approach the subject without him freaking out again?"
All news of a woman being pregant brings goose bumps to a man specially when he is not prepared financially or prepared to become a father. There is no subtle way to approach the subject matter. He will freak out every now and then.
On my personal experiences, I was scared to the point of perspiring twice when my ex girlfriends told me they were delayed in their periods. Good heavens, both were false alarms.
A
male
reader, MichaelS2  +, writes (3 January 2009):
 He will probably feel different later on!I'm sure he will eventually warm up to the idea if not he will own up to his responsibilities.
Most men tend to be extremely scared of being a father especially if they aren't trying to settle down.It's a natural reaction for a man to be nervous about a child if he hadn't planned on the child.
Just ask him if he wants to play a role in the child's life.Don't rush to get married,Start dating and if things work out well stick together.
But if you can't date each other or it doesn't work out,Remain friends and go through the pregnancy together.Offer him his place as father.
He's probably just extremely nervous,so talk to him and explain the situation.
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