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male
age
36-40,
*aniel1987
writes: I'm a 23-year-old gay guy, and I've been with my partner for over three years now. The one major problem in our relationship is lack of sex. My partner never touches my penis, never gives me a handjob, never gives me a blowjob, and never let's me give him anal sex... Basically, he never does anything that involves my penis. He will, however, give me anal sex, but only he gets to experience the pleasure of orgasm because it's his penis he's using. Also, whenever I try to give him a long, passionate kiss, he just gives me a quick peck on the lips and then pushes me away, sometimes saying things like, "All you ever want is sex." All of this leaves me feeling very sad, frustrated and unloved. I've resorted to masturbating in public toilets, as this is the only way I can release my sexual tension. What should I do? Please help.
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anal sex, blow-job, hand-job, my penis, orgasm, unloved Reply to this Question
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male
reader, AvgGuy1  +, writes (7 May 2010):
Some guys are exclusively TOPS... and sometimes SELFISH TOPS (not that there's anything wrong with any particular role). Other guys, like you - and me - are VERSATILE - like it both ways. And some are BOTTOMS and TOTAL BOTTOMS (wanna BE used).
He needs to LET you get out and have some fun with other guys that can meet your physical needs (to be a little more toppish)... either that or you need to move on.
And... when you find someone else... you need to make sure that they are VERSATILE so that you can both enjoy f*king/getting f*cked.
A
male
reader, Boonridge McPhalify  +, writes (5 May 2010):
 yeah sounds like a straight guy fucking a gay man in the ass similar to gay men fucking women in the ass. get out now- selfish behaviour and a lack of respect for your need is driving you to risky behaviour and a lack of self esteem
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A
female
reader, raiders +, writes (4 May 2010):
 As far as I know there might be two types of gay and correct me if I'm wrong but you can be a top or a bottom and normally a top does the penetration and the bottom receives it,,,,Maybe you need to find yourself a bottom or someone in between.
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A
male
reader, dirtball +, writes (4 May 2010):
 I'm with Tisha, I don't think he's actually gay. I think that he's afraid if he touches your penis it will make him gay.
You need to get out of this relationship, it isn't healthy.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (4 May 2010):
 Oh, and stop the public masturbating; it's illegal and might get you arrested. Stick to your own flat. If you come back and say 'oh he won't let me do it there' then I think you are missing the obvious solution. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (4 May 2010):
What should you do? Reconsider the viability of this relationship if you are so unhappy. It sounds as though it's not working for you. I assume you've tried talking; have you considered seeing a couples counselor or a sex therapist? Perhaps he's not actually gay?
Doesn't sound like a match made in heaven. Probably best to move on and find someone you are more compatible with.
Good luck.
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