A
female
age
26-29,
*tellasmomma
writes:ok so i was 12 when i got pregnant with my first set of twins and now im 13 and my boyfriend the father of my last set of twins got me pregnant again and its twins again they will only be 11 months apart and im only 13. What am i supposed to do? I want my babies and so does my boyfriend. Both pregnancys were planned and we want more but i just dont no what to do. and my boyfriends only 17. Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, stellasmomma +, writes (29 October 2009):
stellasmomma is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwell i have all four of my babies home now!
there all healty!
im done with kids for awhile now.
its hard.
losing a lot of sleep.
dads still around!
he has a job.living with my parents!
icouldnt have asked for anything more
A
female
reader, natasia  +, writes (25 June 2009):
 Good luck with it all. I'm sure it will be fine. You have done things a bit differently to how a lot of other people would, but you will have four beautiful children and I'm sure that whatever happens, you will only ever be happy about that. There are so many people who will help you and make sure you do at some point finish your schooling, and then hopefully when you are older you will be able to build the kind of life you want for yr babies. You sound like a strong person - don't worry - it will be great, I am sure.
...............................
A
female
reader, stellasmomma +, writes (25 June 2009):
stellasmomma is verified as being by the original poster of the questionmy babys are great thanks and we found out what they are yesterday its too baby girls! so now i have stella triston kara and sopia
...............................
A
female
reader, natasia +, writes (19 June 2009):
ok, so that is great - your babies are fine. Look, someone said 'age is just a number', and they're right. It doesn't matter how old you are, just how you feel.
You know, there isn't really any advice to give here, apart from to have the courage of your convictions. You're pregnant with twins. You already have two babies to look after. Whatever way we look at this, you are doing only one job here for the next few years - being a mummy. You should sort out what is going to happen with your education, though, I think, although maybe that's something you'll come back to in a few years' time.
I'm not going to say things to make you feel bad about your situation, because you can't change it, and there are also a lot of good things about it.
Just stay calm, be happy and enjoy your life.
...............................
A
female
reader, stellasmomma +, writes (19 June 2009):
stellasmomma is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwe were wrong im still pregnant the dr. says
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 June 2009): age is just a number!!!!!!!!!!
anyway congrats on the babies try NOT to let the cops know how old you are of give anything away because with all those kids at your age the meddling so and so's will go by majority(i feel sorry for the minority)and deem you too immature etc to look after them and take them away. plus your bf will be arrested and im sure he is lovely etc and you DO NOT want any of this to happen so take it from me i ougta know. KEEP YOUR AGE SECRET UNLESS ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY! x
...............................
A
female
reader, natasia +, writes (16 June 2009):
I'm very sorry to hear about the miscarriage - it must have been horrible for you. I hope you are ok.
AFter this, I do hope you will be really careful. Get some proper contraception and concentrate on looking after your babies - and yourself. YOu need to go to school and then you will be an even better mum : )
...............................
A
female
reader, bobbles32  +, writes (16 June 2009):
 Sorry to hear about the miscarriage. The stress of the situation probably didn't help, but honestly as sad as it is, it was probably for the best. You should really stop having children this young, live while you can because you're going to miss all the fun things that you're supposed to do while you're young. You may not think that you want to do all these things but you'll change your mind later. Deal with the blessings you have now and just wait a while before you have more.. I hope you're doing okay. We're all thinking of you.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 June 2009): It is coincidental having two sets of twins back to back, but obviously possible. It is commendable that you want to keep the babies, although you all are very young. Have the 2nd set of twins.
Note that it is not going to be easy raising children esp. at your young age. The two of you still have a long life ahead of you. You don't need to plan anymore kids until you are much older like late twenties. Pls get some form of birth control and use it properly.
Because just think about all the moments that are ahead even now with four kids that you all will have to put on hold or not do at all such as prom, middle school dance, school clubs, school sports, band, majoret, even college and more.
You all are not allowing yourselves the opportunity to have a childhood. You all are now got become adults at 12, 17. You have look forward to finding a job, providing a stable home for these babies and more. You cannot support a family of 6 off of a min wage job this day and time.If you get two jobs you losing time with your precious little ones. And hopefully you will have some dignity and not expect the society to take care of your children through TANF, and food stamps, and medicaid forever.
When the pressure gets too hot do you believe that the daddy is willing to stick by your side 100%? He may or may not. Do yourself a favor by getting on a form of birth control. That way you want be tearing down the walls of your inside. Having children at the tender age of 12 can have damaging affects to your body and newborns.
...............................
A
female
reader, meg2989 +, writes (16 June 2009):
 Oh no!!! Like just today??? omg I'm sooo Sorry... if theres anything I cando please let me know.
...............................
A
female
reader, stellasmomma +, writes (16 June 2009):
stellasmomma is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwell i had a miscarriage on my 2ed set of twins
...............................
A
female
reader, BROOKELYNN555 +, writes (16 June 2009):
well i think that you should use petection during sex.no one should have sex at 12 or 13.now im think you should have the baby.but i think it would be nice to leave it in the hands of people who are ready for a bay.you could make it an open adoption and see your baby whenever you want.
...............................
A
female
reader, meg2989 +, writes (16 June 2009):
If you planned on getting pregnant then what do you mean you dont know what to do? Do you live together or with your parents? Are you going to school or working? How are you financially? I just dont understand what you mean if you said you planned it and now you are confused. Babies are a lot of work and a huge responsiblity as you know already. If you arent ready for the responsibility you need to get on birth control or use condoms and spermicide or maybe even a diaphram. I just dont understand what you mean if you are 13, yet planned both pregnancies with your bf, but now you dont know what to do. Maybe you could message me and explain more about what you are having trouble with??
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 June 2009): Yeah, well, you may not have much of a choice if the state steps in and decides that a 13 year old is not fit to take care of so many children and your boyfriend gets arrested. These babies deserve a good home and adult parents that can financially provide for them. Married parents that are stable and responsible that can give those children the best life possible. A girl your age can't possibly handle all that these poor children require. It's very sad that you are bringing all these babies into the world just because you "want" them, not taking their needs into consideration AT ALL. I think you should give these babies up for adoption to a stable home and loving parents but you are probably too selfish to do that. You aren't even thinking of the burden you are putting on your parents either.
...............................
A
male
reader, Dalmatian +, writes (16 June 2009):
If this post is true and not made up - the 17 year old father should be in jail. A 16 or 17 year old boy havingsex with a 12 and 13 year old is clearly against the law.In the United States a 17 year old could be a junior orsenior in high school and a 12 year old would be in the6th grade. Jail the male to protect the female and otheryoung children. Who knows what other child this molester has been harming. Child protective services along witha juvenile judge should be making the decisions at this point. There has been a total breakdown of family structureand protection.
...............................
A
female
reader, natasia +, writes (16 June 2009):
Well, what is your situation now? How are you living, with the babies? Are you all living together? What involvement do your and his parents have? Are you yourself going to school at all?
Presumably having two more babies would mean it just continues as it is now, but with even more responsibility. I can't see how you could complete your education, though. And you are so incredibly young, I think you will regret the loss of your own childhood. However, you already have twins, so really you are already set on a course that will change your life forever.
Four is enough for most people, though - after this you absolutely must use an effective form of birth control.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 June 2009): I wonder if this is fake. If not, I wish it was. To give birth at 12, she would have had to have been 11 or just turned 12 when when she had sex with her boyfriend. To conceive at that age is pretty crazy. I find it hard to believe that the parents of these two kids would let it happen again, or that the boyfriend stuck around.Sorry if it's real, but... that's crazy.
...............................
A
female
reader, cherry cherry boom boom +, writes (16 June 2009):
you just can't keep all of those children. If you love them you can give them to a older cousin that way you can still see them and they are in good hands. This ya girl peace.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 June 2009): woah woah woah! ive heard about young mums, but four children under the age of 2 at 13?!?! omggg. im 17 and im still a virgin. its things i read like this that doesnt half make me glad i am! your boyfriend could get locked up for this.
...............................
A
male
reader, Dr. John +, writes (16 June 2009):
 Obviously your childhood is out the window. These pregnancies may have been planned but they are very irresponsible on the part of both you and your boyfriend.
For one thing you have to think about supporting these four helpless little human creatures. One would be tough enough at your age let alone as an adult. But you are still not even adults yourselves.
You both have got a long journey ahead of you and unfortunately there are no shortcuts. There will be lots of pain and tears and heartache and that is even if your boyfriend doesn't become overwhealmed and decide to turn tail and run. I hope he doesn't but that does happen all too often. All I can say is work together the best you can and have lots and lots of patience with the children. When they cry don't become short tempered with them but realize that they are crying for a reason, not just to cause you trouble. They can't talk yet so the only way they can communicate is by crying. And show them lots of love.
You just started walking not long ago but it seems you have already really stepped in it. Doc
...............................
A
female
reader, bobbles32 +, writes (16 June 2009):
Are you insane? That's way too much for you to handle. You need to stop now. I'm sure your mom won't be impressed. It's not likely you'll be with your current boyfriend for the rest of your life; we change so much throughout our teenage years, especially when we graduate high school. But now I doubt you'll have that opportunity. I think you should look into new methods of birth control, you're not ready for all this responsibility. That's not how today's society works.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 June 2009): if you wanted the pregnancy then why don't you know what to do? i really think you need to consider your priorities as you are only 13 and you will be a mother of four. you will struggle even more, if you really want to keep them then keep them, but i believe that you should use contraception and delay more children because you're young and you haven't lived your life yet, and i highly doubt that you will have the opportunites which other girls your age do. I don't mean this rudely, just honestly and from my opinion i think that at 13, with 4 children you will lose your youth. although children are blessings and the joy and love in your lives, they're also alot of hard work. you need to make sure you will be able to afford the children, as they are for the rest of your life and you're thirteen and most likely without an income.good luck with the children, if you planned them then you should have considered that they would only be 11 months apart, just take care!
...............................
|
