A
female
age
30-35,
*cklebell
writes: My boyfriend and I have been together for almost a year and he just doesn't get me at all. I met him through my ex and it was great at 1st. I moved in with him after 5 months and left my home town and my children with their dad as there was access issues. things were good then he got very jealous of any of his mates i spoke to and is now very insecure, doesn't let me leave the house on my own. we now have my son living with us and he really doesn't want anything to do with him he says its because hes not his, he is only a year old and doesn't understand why some days he will talk to him and other days he wont. i told him i was leaving and he just asked when i was going i started packing my stuff and then he got upset saying he would change and that we wont fall out any more but nothing has changed. sorry for going on but I'm just completely lost now please help xxx
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insecure, jealous, moved in, my ex Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Ted-ster +, writes (16 June 2010):
Are you crazy for subjecting your child(s) to this situation?! Sorry, Toots, I have no sympathy for you -- when you make babies, you are not number one anymore -- your children should and must be number 1. It is your responsibility to make sure your child is brought up in a safe, happy, healthy, mature, loving, nurturing and responsible home. Get your act together, kick this guy to the curb, and be a (GOOD) mother. You are not putting your child(s) first.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (16 June 2010):
I think you need to leave before this gets any worse. If there were access issues before, this sort of thing could cause you trouble. You don't need a man like this in your life.
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A
male
reader, lsickle +, writes (16 June 2010):
im sorry to say but the symptoms u have described can really only be two things one is he is cheating on u because the sudden change in behavior the raging jealousy. If he can do it so can u so he initiates lock down. It also explains why he wont connect with your son he doesnt want anymore emotional attachments then already established which im sorry is a very unheaalthy and yes unsafe enviorment for him. The second which can be joined with the first. Well is a drug addiction. It seems the mood swings, sudden paranoia, lack of empathy not wantinnng u to talk to his friends because they could let out his secret. Sometimes he seems to be fine happy conversational your son is not a problem on these days then on other days its the exact oppisite there are red flags for both of these allegations. Real quick was your ex or close friends associated in a drug lifestyle. And u can follow where im goin...damn i hate to see children so young have to deal with this type of drama im sorry for your hard times just so u know u are not alone find stregth and i hope u make a choice
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A
female
reader, chigirl +, writes (16 June 2010):
You know what you need to do. He is being unfair to your child and this is hurting not only you but the little boy as well. You are probably right, he is insecure and jealous. And he is not going to change. Often people don't reveal their true colour before you get deeply involved with them. A man will be sweet at first, and then when he has you all wrapped up he shows who he truly is. I don't think your boyfriend chance into being insecure. I think he always was, he just hid it well the first 5 months. I don't think you made a mistake dating him or moving in with him, you wanted to believe the best. Now you have seen who he is, and it's not good enough for you. You should leave.
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