A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:i really like this guy i work with. ill admit i like him more than friends but ive done a hell of a lot for him since he started-supported him through his probation at work, brought him stuff to cheer him up and been a rock to him through his spilt last year where he had a near breakdown. now lately hes been nitpicking about the way i work and making comments and being very obnoxious and calls it joking but he never used to be like this and im hurt because i have really put myself out for him and now hes turing on me -too cocky and stuff. why has he gone like this ? its really upset me
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female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (27 June 2010):
 He's still bitter about his last relationship and he doesn't have the awareness to express that he's not ready for a new relationship. He's thinking: all women are the same, they cause trouble, they are heart breaking, so why be dumb and get involved with one? He's afraid that you are also going to drag him into another painful relationship so he's trying to push you away now.
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (27 June 2010):
 I think you have posted already a few times about this same guy ( you also lent him money,didn't you ? ) and I am really sorry to see you stuck on this non-issue. I call it a non-issue not out of disrespect but for two other reasons- one, his behaviour is not so mysterious, he has used you until he needed you for getting the job and settling in it, and having you assist him in many other ways, now he does not need you anymore so he does not need to be nice to you. Some people are born users and are quick to exploit other people's weaknesses. Two- what do you care about the hows and whys, if you feel he is not acting right to you, just limit contacts with him as much as possible , be coldly polite and no more, people takes too much confidence only when we let them take it.
In other words- move on, this is not gonna work even just as friends.
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (27 June 2010):
 He maybe hasn't realised that you are attracted to him and that your efforts to help him have gone unnoticed (some people are thick skinned). You may have misread him and he may be a user who has now become bored of your attention.
As this affects your work life, I would play it down quickly and forget it. Arguments or disagreements might be difficult as animosity grows.
I wouldn't give him anymore help...I'd just ignore him.
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A
female
reader, Wise Woman of the Forest +, writes (27 June 2010):
 He doesn't sound worth your time. Do you know why his wife and him have split? Perhaps this could be the reason. If it bothers you, you could confront him about it. He will most likely be overwhelmed by your outburst and in denial, but I guarantee you will feel better about yourself and be at least on a level plain with him (:
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