A
female
age
51-59,
*addie1820
writes:I have been dating this man for a total of 5 yrs, I met him while he was in the process of divorcing and we have been together ever since. This june I called his cell phone and a woman answered and I asked for him and she told me he was sleeping and that she was his wife. She said that they married a yr ago when I confronted him he said that he had been with her for the last 2 yrs and he didn't want to tell me bc he didn't want to lose me. Immediately after, he filed for divorce in hopes of a life together but he still lives with her and says that he is only staying b he is saving money to move out he calls it "means to an end". I am tired of waiting bc i have for 5 yrs, I'm concerned that he's playing games,ive even thought that maybe he stop the divorce pocess. I get all these mixed signal like, he had a cutom engagement ring made for me, he wanted me to orfer a weding gown that I loved but I feel as tho he is hiding me. What should I do? He keeps telling me that he will move out in a few weeks but I don't feel good something in my gut tells me that something weird is going on. How can I find out? I love him bbut I don't want to make a mistake. Help!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 November 2010): Everything about him seems 'off'. He married someone else while dating you, and didn't even tell you, didn't say anything about it until you found out by accident?? Doesn't this alone hurt you so much as to not want to have anything to do with him?then he supposedly filed for divorce, just like that, after you confronted him?? So he's being a jerk not just to you, but also to her too.And yet he continues to live with his wife, the one he supposedly just filed for divorce from??this is seriously messed up. All his actions shows he can't be trusted. Either he is a huge liar or he is truly unpredictable and unstable. Both do not bode well for a future stable and fulfilling relationship.
A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (3 November 2010):
 You've been waiting 5 years wait makes you think in a few weeks will finally be it?
Highly doubt he's filed for divorce from this one. I call bullshit. Did you lose some touch with him in those 5 years, since you're completely oblivious to his current marriage? Yes, he's stringing you along..in fact he thought he got rid of you at one point. He doesn't want to marry you if he did, he would have done so 5 years go.
7th vote for ending this new affair.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (3 November 2010):
 I still have that bridge for sale..interested?
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A
male
reader, Jmtmj  +, writes (3 November 2010):
 He can buy you a custom ring but he hasn't enough money to move out...
C'mon, snap out of it!
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm  +, writes (3 November 2010):
 Girl you need to listen to that gut of yours, everything it's telling you is correct!
Caringguy pretty much nailed it!!...the guy is a liar and he is duping you BIG TIME!!!
You need to dump him and find someone who isn't a liar and a cheat!
Best of luck!
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (3 November 2010):
Wow. This is one of the worst things I've heard a man doing yet. This is appalling! The guy kept you waiting for 5 years, no doubt cheated during that time on whoever, and remarried during this time without telling you!
I hate to tell you this, but you'd have to be INSANE to wait for him any longer that you have done already. He's keeping you around like a spare tyre, and you need to stop this now.
He's not going to leave this wife. And even if he does, he'll just keep you around, and probably marry someone else.
You need to just end it and move on. This guy is one of the most blatant liars I've ever heard of, and he's one of the most callous. Please don't sit there waiting for him. He will never really commit to you.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (3 November 2010):
 Well, it's sort of a superfluous question, isn't it ?...
You met him while he is divorcing from a first wife, he gets divorced... and proceeds to marry a second wife behind your back,- and you wonder if he is playing games ?...
Suppose he really does divorces from the second wife and does marry you. What would prevent him, seen his track record, to "get engaged " with someone else right away while he is still married with you ?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2010): You're concerned that he's playing games; it certainly sounds like he is. He keeps telling you he's taking action, but truly it doesn't seem like he is, or he's moving incredibly slowly.
If you're really uncomfortable, get out of the situation and away from his games.
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