A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm not prude to someone's need to self please, I'm not even jealous or against it... but my boyfriend has been masterbating while I'm sleeping. I wouldn't even know about it if I hadn't caught him at least a half a dozen times. (and by caught I mean woke up and saw the laptop light and himself, rolled over and went back to bed.) I don't want to discourage his time to himself but it's starting to take a toll on how I feel about him... frankly it kind of creeps me out that he does it in the bed with me, while I don't have a choice to be there or not!Our sex life has been dull and boring but this is definately not helping my attaction to him. I don't know what to do. Is it silly to be creeped out about it?
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female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (23 March 2012):
 Sorry, I would not be happy either. I think you need to sit him down and talk to him. Specially if the sex have been going down hill.
I know that if my partner did that I would feel less desirable and less attracted to him. If he rather make out with his right hand why the heck is he dating you?
A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 March 2012): It's not silly OP, I mean if he's waking you by doing it then he shouldn't do it. If the sex is dull and boring too then I can see why you'd be annoyed.
One of the reasons he may be doing it is to get to sleep. I do the same thing when I'm having trouble, my girlfriend and I are together a long time now though and she will do it too if she's horny and doesn't want to wake me.
The thing with masturbating for us guys OP is we're ready to sleep and can generally fall asleep easier after ejaculation. So if I'm in bed my girl and lying there for ages trying to sleep, I'll have a quick tug and that will make me fall asleep.
Ask him to stop, he shouldn't have a problem with that and try and spice up your sex life a bit too.
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A
female
reader, Gabrielle Stoker +, writes (23 March 2012):
 Well that is - maybe not creepy exactly - but certainly inappropriate. You may want to have a word with the guy and let him know he should at least have the courtesy to use a different room.
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A
female
reader, shazz1991xoxo  +, writes (23 March 2012):
 No if he is doing it regularly its not good at all, and doing it too much will definitely affect your sex life, you just have to explain to him how it makes you feel, if he is a decent person and cares about you he'll stop xoxo good luck
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A
female
reader, LovelyLemon +, writes (23 March 2012):
 I would let him know that you have caught him doing this. Ask him why he shows less desire for you and has turned to pornography when you are literally right beside him! If he absolutely needs his porn, why doesn't he take it into another room instead of making an awkward situation for you?
I am also not creeped out by men masturbating, but I would have an issue if the man was choosing his hand and computer over real sex. It sounds as if maybe he is addicted to porn and it is sapping all of his sexual energy.
Much love and Best wishes
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A
male
reader, Kyle007 +, writes (23 March 2012):
Not silly at all to be creeped out about this.
Your sex life has been dull and boring and this is why. He has got a real live woman right next to him and he chooses the laptop?
Why is this guy even with you? You really need to ask him that and look at it yourself.
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