A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:This might sound like a silly question and I know that every one is different, but what is the average length of time that a man lasts during sex??I've been with this guy for about 5 months now and we just recently started having sex. He lasts about an hour and I sometimes find myself wishing it would just end after a certain point. My two ex-boyfriends never lasted any more than 5-10 minutes, so I think I'm not used to going for that long. It actually starts to hurt really bad which causes me to lose interest, but I continue through it. I'm starting to feel as though maybe it's me that's making him take so long, like it doesn't feel good for him? It doesn't sound like it during and he always tells me how good it was afterwards, but I always worry. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, DanceInTheDark  +, writes (23 March 2012):
 That seems about the average.
Though, just to make you feel better, my guy can last about an hour.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 March 2012): "What is the average length of time that a man lasts during sex?"
The average length of time until ejaculation.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 March 2012): Most men only last about 5-10 minutes after actually starting intercourse. Of course, the amount of foreplay the girlfriend/wife performs may even shorten that.
If I do a lot of foreplay on my wife, but don't let her touch me, then I can last about 20 minutes, and I'm just trying to give her even more orgasms. But sometimes she will just tell me to 'finish already'. I think some guys with a lot of control just try and give their girlfriend/wife as much pleasure as many times as possible.
He also might have a medical condition called delayed ejaculation. We always hear about quick ejaculators because the women complain about them. My wife had one boyfriend, whom she never had sex with, but he would cum in like 1 minute just from a handjob. My wife jokes that if she ever had sex with him, it would have been horrible and left her hanging.
I would say, do a lot of foreplay on him before you have sex. Touching, licking/kissing his penis, but not to the point of completion. Then start intercourse. If this still doesn't work, then he may have that medical condition delayed ejaculation. I don't know of any studies on this topic, but I do know it has been reported, but in a very small percentage of males. I think it has to do with the nerve endings in the penis. Some say it's because of a bad circumcision. There are stimulating lotions and creams you can try. They heighten the feeling in the penis. Try rubbing those lotions on his penis before you have sex. But MAKE SURE you use something that is suitable for sex. You don't want him putting his penis in you with something that can irritate your vagina, or lead to yeast infections and such.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (23 March 2012):
 I'd hate that too... I think 10 minutes is just fine for me... and 5 is good too...
I think you need to talk to him.. maybe he's holding back thinking you want him to last longer...
If we are having a long session it starts getting uncomfortable for me so I make sure to tell my partner that I'm ready for him any time he would like to finish.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 March 2012): 15-20 minutes on average. Sometimes longer, sometimes shorter.
The others are right OP, I used to think when I was younger that lasting longer was the way to go so I trained my muscles to be able to hold it in, we're constantly being told that longer is better by the media and by women. What we're not told is that 10-20 minutes is perfect and it's not about lasting longer is about not cumming too quickly.
The only person I really agree with here is person12345, just talk to him OP. Don't piss about sneakily trying to make him cum quicker, just tell him that it gets sore for you because he's going too long and give him a time frame that suits you.
Most of us can cum at the drop of a hat OP and we do our best to last as long as possible. Until you know whether he's doing it on purpose or just can't get it done any quicker then there's no point in doing anything else about this.
Talk to him, communicate your needs and until you find out what deal is then don't do any of that noise making stuff. if you don't already do that then making yourself do it is faking and no guy likes a faker.
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A
female
reader, Miamine  +, writes (23 March 2012):
 All guys can be different, there is no average. Some guys have trained themselves to withhold orgasm to give a woman pleasure. Many women find they can't orgasm because the man comes too quickly. There is nothing wrong with him, he's just trying to please you.
If he is going too long and making you sore, you need to tell him. If you can't communicate about what you want in sex, you'll never be happy in the bedroom. He is probably using mind techniques to slow down. Tell him you need him to finish sooner, and he'll use different mind techniques to give you that.
But the other aunts are right, tell him, but also use your vaginal muscles and sexy words and touches to push him over the edge so he can't last so long.
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (23 March 2012):
 Have you tried talking to him about it? Many guys are under the odd impression than all women want a man who can last for hours in bed. He might just think that's what's necessary to please you. You should casually mention that sometimes you really like quickies and suggest having one to see if he can orgasm faster.
You should also ask him what his turns ons are, favorite sex positions, etc... And definitely work on your PC muscles. If you can use those well, you can probably help him get there faster, along with making some noise (moaning, and saying things like the other aunts suggested).
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A
female
reader, Gabrielle Stoker +, writes (23 March 2012):
 There's a lot of variation from guy to guy. The average would be around 15 minutes basis my experience though I much prefer the guys who get it done with within ten.
The thing is, a lot of men are conditioned to think that the longer they go on, the better it is for us, so they try to prolong it as much as they can.
Try to figure out what gets him to cum - I find words often work best for me, just telling a guy I want to feel his warm cum on my skin or in my mouth (or something similar) tends to get them close to the edge and over.
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A
female
reader, shazz1991xoxo +, writes (23 March 2012):
 Hi there don't worry its not you as you said yourself every one IS different mines lasts five mins lol but one of my exes lasted too long, do you know if he masturbates often or does he drink regularly, because alcohol usually makes men last a lot longer? Xoxo
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A
female
reader, LovelyLemon +, writes (23 March 2012):
 It's really not you, honey. My fiance sometimes lasts over an hour. This probably just means that your man has more control over when he reaches climax. My guy tries to hold off coming for a long time just to prolong the fun.
If you want to get him to orgasm faster, try finding what turns him on most. My guy can't hardly help himself if I kiss his ear. And you could even say something like "I can't wait to feel you come", or something to get him to do it faster. Sorry to be explicit!
It's really nothing you're doing wrong. Every man's body is different. You're actually lucky to have a guy that can last so long, as many men can't!
Much love and Best wishes
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