A
male
age
51-59,
*cottieg2000
writes: Hello A woman i know, when we meet, we hug and kiss each other on the cheek. Not long ago her husband died. The last we met we hugged and she placed my head on her breastl Does she want a closer relationship with me? As in sexual? Or is it something to do with her husband death? Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Guardian wings +, writes (28 February 2017):
Hi,
How old is she? A woman may do that to a person who is sad or hurt, to a younger one or to give comfort rather than get. If she wanted comfort, she may have lay her head on your shoulder instead.
If it were sexual, a gentleman wouldn't take advantage of the situation even if she initiates it as she's at a vulnerable point in life.
A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious +, writes (25 February 2017):
Tread very carefully here so that you don't overstep the mark.
This lady is recently widowed. She is grieving. She may be looking for any comfort she can get at the moment and, as someone who she has had contact with in the past, she probably feels relatively safe with you.
Offer genuine support but do NOT attempt anything else unless it is perfectly clear that is what she wants. Put yourself in her shoes and imagine how you would feel if you had just lost your partner and another bloke was immediately hitting on you. (There are some contemptible men out there who think that any woman recently widowed is "fair game" while she is vulnerable and grieving.)
You don't say if you are free to actually pursue a relationship with this lady. If you are not, then you need to tread VERY carefully.
In summary, offer support as a friend but leave her to work out her grief. Further down the line, if you are free and she is still in contact, you could venture into other territory. For now, however, it would be wrong and could end up damaging your friendship beyond repair.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 February 2017): Could be either! You could wait and see how it develops, letting her take the lead, or you could just ask her.
Or thirdly, you could take the high road and give her much more time to recover from her husband's death and wait until she is emotionally ready to love again before getting involved.
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