A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I have a good friend and his wife left him four months ago and they were together for 12 years. For three months he begged her to take him back. As far as I know, he didn't do anything bad and this break-up was out of the blue. He met a girl 4 weeks ago, and they are now in love, and planning on moving in together. I'm concerned that he is on the rebound and possibly faking his happiness just so he can be with somebody. He is the type who doesn't like to be alone. Is it me or is this just way too fast? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, kaylagal  +, writes (4 July 2009):
 It's not you, it is moving fast. Most men who have been in a long term relationship usually jump into another. Sit down and talk to him, voice your concern and it might help.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 July 2009): You could be right although occasionally things like this do work out. He needs to learn from his own mistakes. If you are a good friend, be there to support him if he needs you. If you want more, maybe you should tell him sometime.
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A
female
reader, misscafc +, writes (3 July 2009):
helping someone can be a hard descision because if you say anything your friend might try and accuse you of bieng jealous if him or not wanting him to be happy, he does sound like he is making a hasty decsion but he is got to learn from his mistakes try to explain to him that you think he is moving to fast but be carefull how you put it
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 July 2009): You sound like a good friend. Maybe the deal is clear and known to the involved parties: it can be a passing relation out of which both get the needed comfort. Indeed jumping from a failed relationship to a rebound one so quickly is often a bad choice but maybe they have discussed these aspects and are aware and thus not over confident, just making the most out of a situation and using this deal to lick their wounds. I would trust your friend, especially that he is grown enough to know better, if he is close to your age. And who knows if he isn't happy with this new date on the long term? If they are honest with each other and with themselves they are on the right path.
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A
male
reader, quarky +, writes (3 July 2009):
 sounds a bit fast to me I must admit. There's a danger that he will start to treat relationships with some disdain which will not help him or his partners. Frankly tho' no amount of telling him otherwise may make a difference - something he has to discover himself.
On the other hand, maybe it is a good thing, he's found what he needs.
Either way,be there for him as a friend-that's what they're for after all.
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