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Is there such thing as a much too sweet guy?

Tagged as: Dating, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (5 January 2010) 14 Answers - (Newest, 7 January 2010)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Is there such thing as a much too sweet guy? I'm dating a great guy he sends me good morning texts. Buys me stuff for no reason and makes me art pieces and makes sure I'm okay but I'm kinda aggravated by him. I'm so used to being neglected and stuff and now that I have a really good guy I'm just looking for ways to get away from him. What should I do? Get used to him or let him go on?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2010):

So, you should get used to being in an unhappy relationship and being smothered by your guy. No, don't do that. Your young and if he already wants to settle down tell him gently that your not ready for something so serious. Your only 17 after all. God, and all this people telling you otherwise just have never been in that situation. Perfections isn't what you want in a boyfriend it's what you want in a marriage. Right now have fun and live it up.

:)

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A reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2010):

Most of the time we so get used to Emotional and Verbal abuse.Its natural to feel wary of someone who treats you with respect and kindness.You are young.I don't blame you for feeling wary.You are most probably confused,"Why is he being nice to me when everyone else was not?".Due to quirk of the fate,destiny sometimes lands up this excellent guy in your path.He is sweet,considerate,caring,cares for your happiness,puts you above him.He is not like many other guys who are mean,cunning,look at you as a body to satisfy their carnal needs.Are you feeling scared of your feelings for him or are you feeling scared that he would end up hurting me too?If the nice guy hurts you,it hurts more doesn't it?

When you have a good heart Mom fate lands up in your lap the kind of guy other girls feel jealous about.The one who looks at you with stars in his eyes.The one who covers you with a blanket when you sleep.The one who would never ever abuse you physically,emotionally or verbally.He loves you for your good heart.When the heart is good they find everything else about the person gorgeous too.Little girl,cherish him.Love him.Treat him like a prince.He deserves it.Hang on through this roller coaster ride of emotions.He will be worth it. ~Mrs.Anon

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A reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2010):

Ask him to treat you like shit and see if you feel better... Seriously, if your used to being abused, a kind hand may seem awkward.

You may need the drama of dating assholes... they're fun for a week or two, but once they've beaten your puppy to death the fun can start to wain.

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A male reader, alejandro United States +, writes (6 January 2010):

He is in love..... I'm the "to nice guy", I have seen my guy friends treat there gf's like trash (cheating , disrespecting them,talking about personal stories etc.) but the girl always stay. Then there is me the nice guy that would bend over backwards to show the girl I love that she deserves to be treated like a princess. Be thankful that he is taking all the extra time and effort into making you happy. Take the time to thank him for being sweet . Best of luck and I hope the good guy wins you over.

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A male reader, dca94 United States +, writes (6 January 2010):

dca94 agony auntHi

although i've never been in a relationship, i'm a guy that will probably do that. what i suggest you do is to say that he doesn't need to express his love for you so much. say that you know that he loves you and that sometimes its too much for you to handle. if he loves you that much, he'll understand.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2010):

We've been dating for almost 3 months now and everyone not only me notices how clingy he is and it's not just that he does all those things sweet guys do and yes that includes singing to me and verbalizing how much he loves me but I'm only 17 and I'm pretty sure he's thinking we have like a future as in marriage but again I'm only 17! So, I know Im going to brake his heart but i really am a selfish person and want my freedom back.

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A female reader, kisses87 United States +, writes (6 January 2010):

I have the same situation! My guy will literally call me before work, see me for like 7 hours after I get home from work, leave me to go home, call me when he gets home, and then calls me before bed! Like... he's too clingy almost, but still just a sweet guy. It can be kinda annoying at times, but I know he's the nicest guy I've ever dated.

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A female reader, pinktopaz United States +, writes (6 January 2010):

And this is the reason why good guys turn into a-holes...

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A male reader, YourGuardianAngel United States +, writes (6 January 2010):

YourGuardianAngel agony auntYour Guardian Angel here.

Listen love, what we have here is a case Neglectafobia.

You're so used to being neglected by your past boyfriends that you expect all guys to be like that.

My girlfriend was just like that. All her boyfriends had been horrible to her. When she met me... she felt it was to good to be true. I'm sweet, attractive (she says i'm like an angel sent down just fr her). I don't rsh into things with her and i always find ways to show her i love her.

The thing you have to do is accept that god, or the universe, or detiny, whatever you believe in, has givin you a gift in this guy. Don't let this guy slip away from you. He's like me, he's your guardian angel. +^_^+

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A male reader, The Realist Canada +, writes (6 January 2010):

The Realist agony auntYou need to explain that your uncomfortable with this all at once and he needs to slow down a bit. He probably has no idea that it is bothering you. Don`t be too quick to end it because he may balance out and be able to give you what you want.

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A female reader, Plexi Canada +, writes (6 January 2010):

Plexi agony auntWell.............would setting him free and finding a hot guy who cheats on you and takes you for granted make you feel better? If that is what you would prefer then yes set him free so he can find himself a nice girl who will love him for the sweet guy he is . What I think is that you need to spend time alone, reflect on your past relationships and ask yourself why you feel more comfortable with an asshole? is it a self esteem thing? do you not believe you deserve to be treated nicely? are you afraid of falling for him and then doing something that will ruin the relationship and leave both of you hurt? If you do like hi even a bit and do appreciate him, which it sounds like you are starting to then talk to him about your fears. if he loves you he will understand and be suportive. Good luck hun,

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A female reader, dizzizz United Kingdom +, writes (6 January 2010):

dizzizz agony auntDoes he know this is how you feel about him? I think you probably just aren't used to his behaviour, see how it goes first and if you still feel the same, then tell him. Obviously I don't know this guy, but if you think he's being genuinely sweet towards you, then this is fine, he's just showing his affections towards you.

Best of luck with your relationship xx

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A reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2010):

Any guy thats in love wants to treat her as well as he can. I guess most men think the way to a womans heart is buying gifts and sending texts but is it really ? Im male myself, and pretty young but even I know most women would prefer a guy who says what they want to say in words rather than hidden under gifts. I hope that helps you choose, nobody other than yourself can decide whats the right decision.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (5 January 2010):

Try to get used to him is basically all you can do. Or it might be a sign that you're not really that into him if you're trying to avoid him.

Some guys are too clingy. If he's too clingy for you he's just not your type of guy, and thats fine too. He's just not your cup of tea. Doesn't mean you want to be neglected, but there is a fine balance between too little and too much... Personally I would find what he does annoying if I wasn't 100% in love with him.

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