A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi,I hope some of you can offer me some good advice. A colleague of mine left a few months ago and we got on like a house on fire, so I was a little upset when she left for another job. I also was really attracted to her, but not wanting to mix business and pleasure I just left it as friendly colleagues and never hinted that I like her, to her or to anyone else there.A couple of months after she left, we got in contact with each other via social media and met up for a coffee. It was great to see her again and we carried on having our jokes as if we'd never stopped, and we also shared our problems with each other. We've had coffee a few times, once even at my house and we've even been out for a walk in the country together. It's remained friendly at all times with no touching.After our last meet-up, I couldn't get her out of my head, I couldn't sleep and she was the first thing I thought about when I woke up. I decided to bite the bullet and I sent her a message asking if she'd like to go out for a drink one evening, not mentioning it as a date. I got an enthusiastic reply back from her a couple of minutes later saying, "Yeah, that sounds good! We should arrange something ASAP!" So, we've arranged it for the end of this week.I'll admit, I can't wait and I'm a combination of excited and nervous. The thing I want to ask is do you think she's interested in me the same as I am with her or she just sees me as a friend? I haven't dated for a long time, so I'm incredibly rusty. If you do think she's interested, how can I tell and how can I tell her without sounding too full on? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Roboaxe  +, writes (27 December 2017):
 Good luck man! Don't worry at all about this one. My one recommendation is to make sure to initiate some sort of physical contact. Even if it's as subtle as holding her hand for a bit or touching her shoulder. A kiss would be ideal. Just to let her know that you don't see her as a friend.
A
male
reader, Been there Now over it +, writes (27 December 2017):
Pal, she's done everything but skywriting to show you that she's interested. Let me get this straight: You have great fun together. You obviously have chemistry. You bait her with the suggestion of going out for a drink and gets right back to you asking to arrange something "ASAP!" And you're wondering if she's interested in you.
Go out for that drink. You tell her your feelings at the end of the night, including sweet words that will take you a step deeper than where you you've gone to this point. Suggest the time and place for your next date (have it already figured out), and finish the evening with a lovely kiss. Some hand-holding while walking in the cold winter air wouldn't hurt either.
Seriously, this is great! You're in! I'm jealous. Best of luck to you two. It sounds like you'll have a wonderful 2018!!! My best to you both.
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A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (27 December 2017):
 Sounds good!! I see your starting 2018 on a good note with your new girlfriend :) :)
I don't know why you've been waiting to ask her out for so long! Don't think so much! Go on, enjoy the date and tell us how it goes!
Good luck!
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (27 December 2017):
 I think she is interested, if she wasn't she would come up with excuses as to why she doesn't have time to meet up.
So.. with that in mind, just go slow get to KNOW her. A relationship is not how well a couple flirts and banter with each other. It's having things in common, enjoying each other's company etc. etc.
Is there a fire somewhere that you feel you have to hurry things along?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 December 2017): My questions would be are you both single ? If so don't see the harm
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 December 2017): That, dear sir, is only something she can answer.
You've spent time together, you get-on well in conversation, and you've remained consistently in contact. So all is going in your favor; but you want to know how she feels about you? Sorry, there is no spoiler-alert or crystal ball prediction that can give you any advantage about the feelings of another person.
You will have to judge by her actions, words, and read the signals. If you are rusty; here's your opportunity to get back into practice and romantically woo her. If that is where you want things to go.
She has been receptive and hasn't set any boundaries that restrict your connection from being a romantic-pursuit. Take a risk. You're a grown-up; so handle this like an adult. If she tells you she only wants to be friends; then you will have it strait from the source.
We can't say for certain what she's thinking or feeling; because we could all assume she's attracted to you, but that may not be the case at all. So it is up to you to find out! It is also up to you to offer her that option; and see if there is chemistry to take things in the direction you want it to.
Take a chance and see where it goes.
Best wishes for your New Year! Maybe you have someone who might be a date or plus-one to any parties to bring-in the New Year!
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A
female
reader, Blueeyes2121 +, writes (26 December 2017):
 Id imagine she is interested from what you wrote.
Treat it like a date, for example:
Offer to pick her up, dress up a bit, pay the bill, talk more about hobbies in common, future things you could do, see how she responds... if she giggles alot, or responds with interest to future plans, or touches your leg To show any interest etc.
make sure you make plans at the end for another date - if a moment is right go for a hug or kiss - you should be able to see if there is chemistry/interest..
Good luck!!!!
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious +, writes (26 December 2017):
 I see only positive signs in what you write. She would not be readily agreeing to meeting up with you and spending time with you if she didn't like you.
Has she said anything to indicate she only sees you as a friend? If not, then she is probably waiting for you to make a move.
Assuming neither of you is in a relationship with anyone else (I am sure you would have mentioned it), try lightly asking her how she would feel about going on a date with you. If she looks shocked/worried, you can turn it into a joke and say something like "all the girls love me just as a friend" and pull a sad face.
I have a feeling you may be pleasantly surprised. Fortune favours the brave. Take a risk and ask her - before someone else does.
I hope you come back and tell us what happens.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 December 2017): Yes I would say she is interested too and probably wondering why you are not making a move. Next time you are out hold her hand and when you leave her at her door give her a peck on the cheek without coming over heavy or too eager or too awkword. Just act natural and be yourself.
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