A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've been going out with this girl for about a month now, and all we've done so far is hugging. She talks about kissing and snogging over MSN, but when I'm in front of her she always finds an excuse not to. I don't want to grab her and snog her in case she's not ready. We're both 15. Is she frigid? Should I dump her (I really don't want to because I really like her!). Also, I'm her first boyfriend (although she's not my first girlfriend). Thanks.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (11 April 2007): you say should you dump her cos she frigid. Sounds like you concerned that she wont deliver more. Slow down - you are young yourself and remember you are talking about another person with feelings. She is not there just to pop your cherry for you.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 April 2007): Firstly, seeing as you are her first boyfriend, she is bound to be a bit uncomfortable about the whole thing. Calling her frigid isn't very nice and i'm sure that it would make her feel bad if she heard you saying that. As for her talking about snogging and kissing on MSN it's much easier for her to say that than do it. Give her a chance, after all, you have only been going out with her for a month which isn't long. She's already hugged you, snogging is another huge step altogether. And remember, don't force her into kissing you, make sure that she is 100 percent ready before kissing you. That way she'll like it as well.
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A
female
reader, TasteofIndia  +, writes (11 April 2007):
 Frigid isn't a nice thing to call your girlfriend, now! But, we'll let that go. I know what you mean, sweetness.
You DEFINITELY shouldn't dump her. If you really like her, you'll have the patience to wait until she's comfortable enough to kiss you. It sounds like to me this girl is just painfully nervous about kissing you, which makes since if you're her first boyfriend. She's new to all of this! Let her take her time.
If you're dying to kiss her, be a gentleman about it and make it special. Don't do it around other people as that will just make her nervous. Have a date together then set up the moment for a nice kiss. Maybe give her a rose, or bust out some candles? At this age (okay, at any age), girls really love simple, sweet gestures. Romance her and make her feel special and beautiful.
If she's just not ready don't push too hard. When she's ready, you'll know.
Don't just dump a girl because she won't "put out". That is not a good way of living your life. Some of the best girls are worth the wait, sweetness.
Enjoy! You sound like a sweet boyfriend.
xxIndia
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A
male
reader, Jamer70 +, writes (11 April 2007):
 She may talk about it but the real thing is different.
You two are only young, no need to rush anything.
If shes not ready she not. Dont push her or she will dump you.
Just go slow and enjoy the relationship and your youth
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A
male
reader, pfairypepper +, writes (11 April 2007):
She is just shy. She obviously wants to, but is maybe embarressed. You should take the initiative, but no don't just grab her and snog her. Take it slow, but be reassuring and understanding.
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