A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:please could i get some very much needed help and advice regarding my mum and her doctor ,for a month now my mum who is a good looking woman for her age 59,has been visiting her doctor,regarding feeling low and down and finding things a bit tough since my dad passed away last year ,the stand in locom doctor who is half her age began to show his concern the more and more she went and he began saying things to her like you need a lot of tlc and looking in to her eyes,she talked to me about it and we both felt sure that his interest in her welbeing was more than mearly proffessional and that this doctor had taken a real shine to her ,she went away last week for a short break and he requested to see her again on her return to see how she was feeling ,this was when he told her he really liked her and came round today (0709)to see her and was all over her ,she likes him but hes a doctor he is married and has 2 kids ,what should she do ,its not the norm is it? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Escalaya  +, writes (7 September 2007):
 If you really need good proof, next time she goes in have her carry a Pocket Voice Recorder, once the appointment starts, have her turn it on, to record the whole appointment. If there was any bad behavior than it'd be caught on tape, and it would provide valid proof if you decide to file a complaint.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 September 2007): Hi Love.
NO This is no were near normal, He is taking a vunerable woman with depression who has resently lost her partner and harrassing her in a seductive way, As he knows she is vunerable he thinks by being overly nice and caring she may be lonely enough to fall for this.
How many women in simular situations has he done this to I wonder.
Love report this behaviour, if you need more proof as to this behaviour as they may say as your mother is depressed she is over reacting, cover yourself by the next visit make it if poss at her house and be there but invisible to see for yourself how he is I suggest not on your own,
Then you have witnesses to this behaviour....He needs to be stoped at his seedy little game of preying on women whom I would as go as far to say may be to do with money as well, Lonely widowed depressed hunny get him reported GOOD LUCK TAKE CARE LOVE MANDY XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 September 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthankyou all for your advice on this subject ,i will pass all this on to my mum whos head is in bits at the moment ,thanks for all your good advise x
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A
female
reader, hlskitten +, writes (7 September 2007):
 Hi
Ive been in a similar situ. I dont tell many people because i dont think they actually believe it! But its appropriate here.
I too went to my doc a few years ago when i was feeling down after i split from someone i loved.
I told him i had joined a dating site but probably shouldnt of done because i wasnt over the guy.
Basically he asked me to go back 2 weeks later and if i was no better he would give me some pills. Said its normal to take a while to get over someone. (your mum was asked to be seen after 2 weeks too? so maybe thats standard procedure) and told me he was on the same dating site as me. He was single though, 12 yrs older than me.
Later that day i had a txt message from someone saying hows my madkitty. from your friend tom the alley cat!
Obviously didnt know who it was but my name on dating site was madkitty. So he had been on there and found me.
After a few clue txt he admitted it was him. I basically told him he was breaking the law. I rang the police even, felt a bit scared really! They said its not against the law but it comes under the code of ethics in medicine! I could of reported him to the practice manager apparently but i didnt. He was actually a good doc aside from that.!
To cut a long story short, i went back 2 weeks later, he appologised but still asked me out for dinner! I went. I know, wrong, but there ya go. I changed docs and was seeing him for a few weeks. He said people meet people through work all the time, why cant i?
I didnt stick with him. I was vulnerable at the time and didnt like him all that much anyway, i was just flattered! We stayed in touch for a few months as mates, he was a very lonely guy.
Hes now married and i dont speak to him, but i guess all im saying is yes, people take advantage sometimes but also, they dont see it that way and maybe he genuinely likes your mum.
But its still wrong yes!
He could lose his job. See what he does next.
Good luck.
C xxxxx
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A
male
reader, duce00 +, writes (7 September 2007):
 This is difficult. The easiest thing is to just get a different doc. If you mum wants to file a complaint she can but he may just as easily fight it and say there was some kind of confusion. Here in the states a doctor can loose theyre liscense to practice medicine for improper conduct. Its a form of malpractice. Doctors will do what ever they can to stay in business and Im sure this guy is no different.Unless you have clear evidence I dont think this can go much farther than a complaint. Maybe thats enough in the UK but I doubt it would fly here in the US.Think of it this way. If this guy is so sleazy how good a doc can he really be?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 September 2007): Well, before you said he was married I was going to say "ggod for her" but now, I say she needs to make it clear to him that she doesn't want to be involved with an already married man. It sounds like he is taking advantage of her fragile state being that your father has passed. Also she tells him that, she should switch doctors. As far as telling the clinic I don't see the point. He would just deny it and that would be that.
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A
male
reader, Escalaya +, writes (7 September 2007):
She needs to file a complaint to the Clinic/office/hospital he works out immediately. She should also tell the man that she wants no part of that kind of relationship, considering he is married, and has kids. Also, change doctors immediately.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (7 September 2007):
 She needs to start seeing another doctor. This one has a screw loose.
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