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Is my husbands fetish normal?

Tagged as: Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (6 October 2008) 2 Answers - (Newest, 6 October 2008)
A female United States age 41-50, *nluv4eva writes:

I have a question about a weird fetish my husband has developed in the last few months. Lately, instead of us having intercourse, he likes to watch me have intercourse with a vibrator instead while he holds it. Is this normal, and if so why does he get off on this? It has kind of been hurting my feelings that he does'nt want to be with me.

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A female reader, michelleAKAmandi United States +, writes (6 October 2008):

michelleAKAmandi agony auntIt's normal for someone to get off on this type of thing, however; it shouldn't replace the actual act of sex. Did he stop having sex with you completely when this started?

This is something that is very exciting for people and it should be enjoyed, but sweetie if he has stopped having sex with you... then of course, as I'm sure you know, something is not right.

I know it has to hurt your feelings and cause you to be upset, rightfully so!!

Talk with him... ask him about it and then make him aware of your feelings. He surely shouldn't be using this to take place of your lovemaking.

Communicate with him and see where that leads you with this.

Good luck sweetie and let us know how things are going for you.

Take care,

Michelle

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A female reader, TasteofIndia United States +, writes (6 October 2008):

TasteofIndia agony auntIt sounds relatively normal, a lot of men get off on that sort of thing. Is he avoiding being intimate with you all together? Does he still kiss you, pleasure you? He may just be so excited about this new routine, that he has forgotten how to be a gentleman and make sure that you're feeling loved and having fun - not feeling neglected, like it seems that you are.

Talk to him about it. Tell him that you love having fun with the vibrator, but that you miss having sex with a real man! Sex can be fun WITH a vibrator as well. Why not combine the two together?

I hope you two find a happy solution! Good luck!

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