A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am a 19 year old female who works a full time job and in college in business management. I have a boyfriend who is 24 whom i have known for five years. I currently live with my mother who had kicked me out at 17 because of an abusive relationship and being addicted to prescription drugs. I now pay all of our bills, half the rent, and her insurance and medication. (she has diabetes and an injured rotator cuff). My mom doesnt like my boyfriend and tries to run my social life..running people away from me.i also know she wants whats best for me and is scared i will make mistakes she made but i have learned what not to do from her.now here is my questions,should she have any right in how to tell me to live and who i am allowed to be with or be friends with when i am successful with a great circle of reliable friends and have a healthy relationship with my boyfriend?is it wrong for me to want freedom to stay out late or stay the night at my bfs house when i am contributing to paying my part at home?
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female
reader, Ich_liebe_dich  +, writes (8 March 2010):
 NO'' its not wrong.. for heaven sake i dont understand sometimes some Mother's, why they cant leave their Child alone, if their child is only 10 years old i think its ok to drive the system. But hey' you are a grown up person. Stop it' Dont let her manipulate you. its ok if she sometimes give you an advice but dont let her ruin your life. Remember this is YOUR life nobody else but YourS'..
Just do what you wanna do for your life dont argue with her just let her know where is her border, Let her know that you will love her forever but she must learn now how to let go. Believe it or not she must know now that you are not anymore her little girl. She can not control everything now. I wish you good luck dear.
A
male
reader, Jaybmac  +, writes (8 March 2010):
Im kind of the same as you.. I had given my mother enough second chances, but she kicked me out a few days before my birthday this year and I became so annoyed i ended up moving to my grans house completely.. After i moved out my mum got quite depressed and angry with herself for messing up, I suppose you could say me moving out gave her a right kick up the butt.. So i say from experience, its your life and from your age your aloud to do practically anything you want now.. Dont let mistakes tie you down in the future :)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 March 2010): no its not righ that your mother runs your life because you are an adult you should know what you are doing and what you are getting yourself inot. well its your life and you can make of it what you want. but shes your mother and shes concern because she wants you to have a happier life. you're old enough you can do whatever makes you happy, and what you think its right. its always good to hear our mother's adive because sometimes they may be right. but if you feel that your relationship is going well to you then be happy.
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A
female
reader, themisses +, writes (8 March 2010):
Moms tend to relive their lives through their daughters. What ur mom really should want is for you to be happy. You can listen to her advice but let her know.. Ultimately the decisions in ur life are up to you. She should know that she raised you properly to know what's right and wrong. Don't let her run ur life or else ull end up miserable but don't completely shut her out either. She does want what's best for you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 March 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionShe was in the abusive relationship and on drugs not me. Just to be clear and you do not read it wrong.
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