A
female
age
30-35,
*ove sick girl
writes:Ok so is it so wrong for a 14 year old girl who loves a 18 year old man be such a bad thing? I feel in love with a man named Daniel and he feel in love with me to, but my mom found out we were together and called him to "talk" to him. Now I am band from seeing or toling to him and i feel terrible. So is a 14 year old datin a18 year old really that bad and should i feel guilty i put him and i through this? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, amysuperlovexxx  +, writes (8 June 2012):
hey lovesickgirl
I dont think its wrong for a 14 year old girl and a 18 year old guy to be dating your only 4 years apart thats a normal ammount of years i dont think its wrong i am exactly the same i go out with a 19 year old guy and i am 15 its perfectly normal!!!
A
female
reader, GheyGirlx +, writes (9 April 2009):
Mod note to the recipient of this answser: Please do NOT answer all in initial caps next time or your answer WILL be rejected!*************************************************************** Personally I don't think it's wrong. I'm 14 and my boyfriend's just turned 18 but I love him and he loves me. If it's love and not just being used I don't see the problem. People smoke, drunk under age but no one causes hassle over that. Some people are like 36 going out with 18 year olds, not THAT is wrong! See, people only judge this from the suxual side of the relationship which is absolutely ridiculous if you ask me. If you don't get pushed into things and he understands you, then there's no problem whatsoever. People have different opinions just because you're not old enough to have sex until you're 16 but most of the people that will be answering your questions will have lost their virginity under the legal aga. If it was really that bad it would be against the law, which going out with them isn't. No one is bothered once you're over 16 but that's because they just think about the sexual side. Don't worry about it, I'm sure if you really do love each other you'll find a way. Email me at DearCupid if you want to talk more.
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A
male
reader, Bassman +, writes (7 January 2009):
I think I can relate to you with your situation... only I am the 18 year old guy.My girlfriend is currently 14 years old. My girlfriend and I are fairly confident that the only thing that matters is 'our' happiness. We are very close to what I can classify as in love. I am a very well respected and trusted guy. Slowly I am gaining the trust and approval of her mother. It's very nderstandable what your mother is going through and how she is reacting. I have to say the problem is not the age difference, it's the boy. Whatever the reason maybe, if this boy that you "love" is really respectable than your mother will grow to trust and support your emotional connection to this boy.
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A
female
reader, candace +, writes (2 October 2008):
oh sweetheart.... no no no! This guy should be arrested. You (even though you may disagree) are still a baby. You still have so much to learn about life. And of coarse you are in love with him...I am sure he has swept you off your feet, plus you feel more mature and older around him. You are not too young to feel love, but this guy has no right messing with you.
I have three children (14,13, and 11) my boys are the older ones. If they tried to date a 14 year old girl at the age of 18 --- I would kick their asses. No WAY!
Same goes for my baby girl--- well her brothers would take care of it.
Listen to your Mom honey... you are going to feel what you feel for this guy... He can only hurt you sweetie. Nothing good can come of it. You know that little dream you have that you two are just perfect together and in-love and can just stay together....well, honey---all of us girls have those dreams...
That is what they are...dreams. They are not reality. Reality is you have so much fun ahead of you and so many things to do (even if you think you don't want to) set yourself out there in this great big world...find your spot sweetie... Find you...it so much more fun than finding a guy. Please remember that those love feelings you have are real and true, but they are just feelings and they can end you up in some very bad places in life.
Please listen to your Mom. She really loves you.
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A
female
reader, unknownlady +, writes (1 October 2008):
 I think at 14 its kinda of unacceptable..
your mum is only doin this to protect you, just think shes live don this earth a hell of a lot longer than you have and has probably had experiences like this or have witnesses them.
4 years difference isnt bad im 17 and im goin out with a 21 year old, yet i thought my parents wouldnt e so happy so i asked them first before i went ahead with it, they met him and liked him and everythin was ok... been together 6 months now... but this 4 year gap at the age of 14 it quite serious reali..your young and hes much more older with sexual needs, and maybe ur mum is protecting u because at 14 your nt ready for that yet, plus ur under age for this year gap anyway.
id just listen to your mum, she seems right in this case.. and id understand if it was my parents. maybe when ur 17-18 start th erelationship with him then.
Good luck
x
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (1 October 2008):
 If you were my daughter I would do exactly what your mom has done. There is a huge difference between a 14 year old and a 18 year old. Period. Look him up when you are 18.
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A
female
reader, CarolinaGrl +, writes (1 October 2008):
it is not wrong that your are dating an older guy! i just turned twenty on 9/11 and my boyfriend is 36 ...you should follow your heart like i tell myself age aint nuthin but a number.. if it dont work out between you and him then you will have learned from your mistakes
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A
female
reader, OddOne +, writes (28 September 2008):
 It's not a bad thing. I used to date an 18 year old at 12. Age gaps don't really matter, as long as it's love. And not just being used.
Love is all that matters. Just don't let him use you.
And if he does, he'll get into a lot of trouble with the law and probably get locked up for it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 September 2008): It is wrong! I promise you, when your 18 you will look back at 14yr olds and wonder what the hell that guy was thinking
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A
female
reader, lilgirly  +, writes (28 September 2008):
 your mom only wants what is best for you,and she might not understand that you love him, and you don't know what might be going on inside his head..that is why she's trying to keep you away from him..4 years difference isn't that bad..but in this case it is..cause you're still a minor..and he is not..i'm sure that if you were 18 and he was 22 she wouldn't have a problem with that.. take care XXX
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