A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: ..my mom is 55 nw . My dad died 26 years back..I know that its been long that she had sex..i even know how it feels with out sex for humans ..so m planing to find someone for her sex life...is it right r wrong..?
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 April 2015): Perhaps your concern has gone too far. Your mother's sex-life is none of your business. She hasn't asked you for help, and she isn't the one contacting DC to express her personal concerns in that area.
She has survived this long, and most mothers don't want their children meddling in such matters of her life.
Using a little logic here; if she had a secret-lover, you wouldn't know about it. As for society, your mother has survived judgement from society for over 20 years. I think
YOU are the one SHE should be worried about, not the other way around. If you were taking care of your own life; perhaps you would have little time to be so absorbed in hers. As a good son; see to her safety, her financial security, health, and general well-being. Sex is too personal.
Let your mother live-out her life with peace and dignity.
Never you mind about whether she is getting sex. If you have so much time on your hands to concern yourself about that; perhaps you might be more distracted, if you would concentrate on your own sex-life.
She is an adult, and has dealt enough with the outrageous things that go on in the minds of men. Her son should be the least of her worries at this time in her life. If she has survived without your help to find a man this long, she's doing okay. You are delving in an area of your mother's privacy, most inappropriate for son.
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 April 2015): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI wanna her to have secret sex partner ....
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (25 April 2015):
 OP, you don't know your mother very well. She was widowed at 24, and that happened 26 years ago.. ( before the OP was born ?) which would make her 50 today. But in your post you say she is 55. You don't even know how old she really is, and you want to know how she feels about her sex life ?....
Hint hint :....Indian society is evolving, MAYBE ( in fact, there's actually a backlash going on in terms of sexual customs and women's freedom ) ,but veeery slowly.... and , for a son, particularly a good Hindu or Muslim son, getting so mixed up in his mother's sexuality, and well knowing the ridicule and social ostracism,if not worse !, he would expose his mother to by encouraging her to take up with a lover , or an FWB...
sorry but no, that would not be sweet and caring, that would most most probably be and feel, disrespectful, morbid and prurient...
I smell a big trollish rat here.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2015): As a mother I actually think this is a very sweet and caring idea from a son. So many, many parents become totally de-sexualised by their children and it can cause big problems for a parent actually owning and admitting into the open their own desires and pleasures.I had a really good chance of being with the man of my dreams a couple of years back, but I lacked confidence. All it would have taken was for my daughter to say to me "Mum, you are amazing and have loads to offer and need to enjoy yourself, just go for it". But she didn't. She refused, absolutely point blank, to even discuss the possibility of me having a partner. And it held me back. I deeply regret it.I don't think the OP is saying he will openly ask men to have sex with his mother. He is thinking selflessly of her just as a woman. And I think some of the responses on this site are overly dramatic and ridiculing. What a kind thing to want to do.But I suggest the best route would be to find an older person, similar to his mother's age or a bit older, and ask for their advice about this. OR talk to his mother directly about it if she will (it seems she won't). Maybe an older family member can help or someone who has a trustworthy position in the community? Also, the idea of finding Mum a friend is a good one. I think in Indian culture it will be harder to 'matchmake'. And it seems that the OP is actually sensing that something in his own culture is not helpful, in regard to women in this situation. Cultures do become renewed and do change. And maybe this is one aspect of Indian culture that needs to be given more thought?
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2015): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionif she findes one partner for her self I'll be happy for her..
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 April 2015): Does it really matter who the Matchmaker is if she finds her Match?No.
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female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (24 April 2015):
 I think finding her a friend would be a better course of action (and not a male).
Maybe get her interested in a charity or a hobby that the community can benefit from - that way she will get out of the house and met new people.
My grandmother's second husband died when she was in her 30's, she NEVER had a "man" after that. She just wasn't interested. She was however very social and active in many projects in her community and loved us grand-kids.
You mom might still be grieving. She might never get over that loss. And she MIGHT be content with how her life is. Maybe she LIKES her quiet life.
Sex is important, but for many COMPANY is WAY more important.
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 April 2015): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI think she is worried about me where I feel bad .and what des society talk...my dad died when she was 24....now I'm feeling how she was with out a partner she can't even tell anyone her feelings...now I'm talking as a human not has her son...sex is also important in life right..
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 April 2015): Its nice that you think about your mothers needs.all human have sexual needs, but since your mother dint go out looking for sex all this years it looks like she is a conventional woman.so I would suggest you to ask her if she will consider remarriage, which being an Indian widow she will automatically say no, but its up to u to convience/give her confidence to say yes to remarriage.its not only sex but everyone needs a companion
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 April 2015): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks u everyone ..des many years we r in joint family so even she wants to partner she can't find one. And she is resiverd tipes..now we are alone she can find .BT shell not talk much t people...I'm not gonna ask any men directly to have sex with her..I'm wanna help indirectly...
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 April 2015): You shouldn't be pimping out your mother. How would you approach a man for that purpose? "Excuse me sir, would you like to have sex with my mother?" Any man you would ask, would not have respect for your mother for accepting.
It's up to her to find whomever she wishes to share her body. It is most irregular and inappropriate for you to presume on your mother's sex-life. That's very private.
If you wish to introduce her to fine gentlemen to keep her company, that's one thing. To find her sex-partners is outrageous! Your heart is in the right place, but searching-out sex-partners for your mother (or father) is not a duty required by a son.
She found your father without any help from you. Don't judge by her age that she couldn't find someone else. I'd leave it up to her to fulfill her needs when she decides to do so. I trust she'd do a better job at doing that, than you would.
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female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (23 April 2015):
 I think your mother will be surprised to have her son trying to find her a sex partner. I would let her manage her own sex life. Sorry you never knew your Dad, he must have died before you were born. I would let her manage her own life, she's been doing it for 26 years now. Best wishes.
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male
reader, no nonsense Aidan  +, writes (23 April 2015):
It’s a bit weird but I wouldn’t go so far as to say it’s wrong. It’s obvious you care for your mother and that’s nice. Wouldn’t it be nicer to find some-one for her to date and get to know as a companion first though, rather than some-one just for sex? Does she want your help? Talk to her about this and encourage her to see all her good points and remind her why some-one would be lucky if she wanted to get to know them.
I wish you all the very best.
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