A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hello, Im a 24 year old woman, Im still a virgin. Ive been with a 29 yr old boyfriend for two months, hes been good to me so far. Ive had already had other boyfriends before, we made out but never went far 'cuz I didnt want to. I love making out with my current man, and things have advanced to the point of me giving him a handjob and him to me. I've wanted to do these things 'cuz I feel ready, besides, I feel I've always been repressing my sexuality because of my upbringing. Somehow, my mother found out I'm going to his apartment and she freaked out, and she really lectured me and basically thinks I'm some sort of slut (We live in Mexico, and shes kinda conservative you see). This really hurts me because I've always tried to please her and my dad (who recently passed away tragically, which obviously contributes to her growing anxiety), Ive always been a good daughter, excellent student, I graduated medschool at the top of my class, and really spend most of my time at home. She told me I've only known this guy 2 months, and that he'll just use me and that other people will see me as an easy kind of woman and stuff...geez im not even planning to have sex with him anytime soon! Is it really that bad to explore someone's sexuality even if its only been 2 months and cosidering my age? What do you think?
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female
reader, rubyrose  +, writes (2 December 2010):
obviously i come from a different culture to you, but at the same time i also believe in not having sex too early in a relationship..
ive been seeing the guy im with for 2 months as well.. im a bit younger than you, and so havent had many make out partners- but i think its great that you feel like you're finally ready to take the next step.. i mean its not like youve rushed into it before, so you obviously know that you're ready.. but as for him just using you, i would make sure that you do have dates outside the bedroom and that do no always involve physical contact.. see how long you can go in between explorations and see if he can last without pressuring you!
=)
A
female
reader, Princess Aunty  +, writes (30 November 2010):
Personally i think your mother is right. i mean you have known that guy for only two months and you are already making out with him!!! you should have waited for a bit of more times and try knowing him better. i bet two months is not enough at all to know someone completely.
Also, that guy might have a bad impression over you. he might think that you are an easy girl (since you have already start making out with him within two months only) Yeah you risk of getting the title being called a slut!! Since if that guy is using you ( i said IF), he would share it with his friends and all (the story). There's one way you can use to confirm if that boy is not using you. stop making out with him. don't allow him to come close to you. if he loves you truly he'll just need your companion not the pleasure that you are giving him.
on the other hand, you are also right. i mean you have managed to keep your virginity up to 29. thats a great thing. but given you are from a very conservative family if you continu making out with that guy you'll have a very bad image vis a vis your family. wait for some times and if you see that he is your mr perfect, then why don't you think about marriage with him?
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