A
female
age
30-35,
*liceinunderland
writes:Morning All,I was again wondering this week, and once I came out of my wonderland, I couldn't help but think of the answer to the question I had thought of...I will try and make as much sense as possible.When someone is told something often, is it reasonable to think that if that something happened, it happened because the person was told so often that they began believing it would happen and sub-consciously made it happen?e.g. (True Example) My friend once pretended he was gay as a joke, after that everyone (knowing he wasn't really gay) kept saying that he was gay. A few months later he came out as gay. Is it possible that being told so often can lead someone to believe and therefore make something happen?Another example could be what happened to me.I was talking about this guy I had been talking to for a long time (I hadn't really had an interest in him) but eventually my friends started saying that something "romantic" was going to happen between us. I hadn't really thought of it much, but every time I mentioned him, they would again make this suggestion. A few weeks later I realized I had developed feelings for him and we kissed. The thing is after we kissed I realized I didn't like him in that way, could it have been down to peers and me believing that this something happened? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, terrifenby +, writes (16 April 2010):
 The things with people who think they are gay they hide it.. My uncle is gay and he had plenty of girlfriends before he came out. And if you ask him to this day he will say he was always gay and the girls were to try to feel 'normal'. So whether you were dating him or not the chances are he knew he was gay and just trying to fight it because he was afraid of what others may think or maybe there were other reasons! I dont know but you got to respect the lad for coming out down ya! It takes alot of courage just because as sooo many things are.. beeen gay is still by some people frowned upon! :)
A
female
reader, Aliceinunderland +, writes (16 April 2010):
Aliceinunderland is verified as being by the original poster of the question I like some of the opinions here, thanks,
as for you saying this boy was gay before he came out.... I was dating him when we came up with the joke :D
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A
female
reader, Not My Name  +, writes (16 April 2010):
 In my opinion , ...
Your friend was already gay and just testing the water to see what others would think, or trying on for size what it would be like to come out of the closet.
Your friends could tell by your comments that you liked this guy even tho you were in denial, and probably from you relaying stuff to them, that he liked you too. It was a no brainer you would probably get together. You found out tho that you probably just liked the idea rather than the actual guy.
Just incase tho, .... I'm gunna win the lotto, I'm gunna win the lotto, I'm gunna win the lotto, I'm gunna .... lol :-)
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 April 2010): Possibly
My friends kept telling me something romantic was happening between my best friend (female) and me. I said no. She said no. Yet we started getting closer and closer. Trouble is, I've listened to them so much, I think they are right and she IS perfect for me and have fallen for her. But she doesn't feel the same. If they hadn't kept on at me and telling me how perfect we would be together, I doubt I ever would have thought so.
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A
female
reader, terrifenby +, writes (16 April 2010):
The thing with the kiss, your friends tell you some thing often enough and you may start to feel like their is some truth in it. But as you found out after kissing him there was none. Your friend the one who came out gay, maybe the joke as he said it was, was to see how people react, so that when he did come out of the closet it wasnt such a big suprise. When you read into things too mcuh you tend to see things that aint there! I your theory was right then im going to get people all around me to tell me im going to win the lottery...i could do with the money! It is a good question and alot of people will have their own views on it. This is mine and i hope you found slightly interesting! :)
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