A
female
age
,
*osy01
writes:hi, i hope someone can help me get over this as my heart is so so sore, about 35 years ago i fell in love with a guy we were getting married then something happened and we drifted apart 8 weeks later he was married, the night he got married he phoned me said he had made a mistake on the rebound, then came to me a few more times over the years but he was married so i sent him away, about a year ago he got in touch through the internet we began talking but it developed into more he wanted me and i him, i was in a relationship for 27 years and we split as i knew i did not want him anymore i just wanted jim, then jim decided he was leaving his wife she phoned me and told me i would never get him, he did not get in touch for a few weeks then he started phoning me again and in august he asked me if i would have him i jumped at the chance as i love him so so much, we went away for the weekend but after 1 day he decided he did not have the guts to do it and that he was scared, his wife is a very domineering woman and when she caught him talking to me she smashed his pc made him get rid of his car, he was not allowed out by himself or left alone incase he conntacted me she even stopped him from going to work.then about 12 weeks ago he phoned me and told me he cant forget me and that it was me he loved that he had tried so hard to forget me but failed, we started talking on the phone again and then 2 weeks ago he said he was coming to me for good this time i was over the moon with happiness, we spent a great week together he changed his address to mine changed his doctor to mine and also opened a new bank account here so i thought well this must be it this time, but then on tuesday night he decided to phone his daughter and she started crying asking him to come home begging him and because he is such a weak man gave in and went now im left with all those great memories his daughter is 30 and married too thats the hard part, i know i have no right to feel this as i knew the situation but i just love him with all my heart and its breaking here, i just want the pain to go away please help, i even found out that he told his wife he was with a pal for the week and i want him to hurt as much as me, i have a drawer full of letters from him 186 emails and texts on my phone from him, i was so down last night i wanted to take them all to her and let her see what he is doing to me but then i thought no as he would hate me for that, everyone says oh he was only looking for a good time but i swear that was not the case we were so very very happy that week but now what can i do to feel better please please can someone help.
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female
reader, single gal  +, writes (16 April 2010):
so sorry to hear that.but lets face it, if he reall, reslly wanted to be with you, he would have started the divorce proceedings. i think he just wanted to experience what cud have been.
and why did it take so long for him to figure it out, why now.
my advise
burn those letters.
it might hurt, but you are hurting yourself more by keeping a door open for this guy. he keeps running to you, but always goes back to the wife. do you really want to go through that everytime
A
female
reader, sugarplum786  +, writes (16 April 2010):
 You need to move on and do not let him in your life again. This is a closd chapter.Time heals all wounds and just remember everytime you let him in you set yourself up for all the pain and heartbreak again.
He has no back bone and is just going to walk out everytime someone comes crying to him. Try keeping busy, meet friends, find a way to enjoy life and dont think about him, No contact is the best place to start.
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