A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hi,so my problem is that I'm in a relationship with my professor at college I'm only 20 and he is 42...we meet up 3 times a week in this apartment .However, we didn't have sex until now although that we have been together for 4 months because i said i wanna do it only when it feels right. i wanna ask you guys if that is ok or there is anything wrong with what we are doing i mean that we are both adults and we are in a relationship already. Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Tyedyedturtle  +, writes (25 May 2011):
 Say goodbye to whatever college education you were obtaining and tell him to kiss his career goodbye, if this is ever to surface! Look, I'm young and I have had a hot professor who I would love to bang, but it is unprofessional, looks bad, and jeopardizes everyone's future. Think before you screw! (Again.)
A
male
reader, The Realist  +, writes (24 May 2011):
 It is a big problem if he is in any way connected to your grades or school acheivements. He may lose his job then and you may be expelled. Generally I would say that it is a bad idea but you two are adults and if school regulations do not have anything to say about it then you have to do what makes you happy.
Look into it under prof/student relationships because I don't think you would want anyone to be punished for this.
...............................
A
female
reader, Dear Mandy  +, writes (24 May 2011):
 HI
I bet your not the only student he is abusing his role with. He is your PROFFESSOR, which means he has abused his career and will loose his job if this were ever to surface.
If he actually cares about you, he would wait untill you finish your graduation and leave. Then it wouldn't be such a problem, but as it is now it IS a problem a very BIG problem. And so wrong. Its hard if two people fall for eachother I get that, but lets just say your a teacher....would you sleep with your student? be honest your answer would be no, and that would be the right answer.
...............................
A
male
reader, Drew21 +, writes (24 May 2011):
 Yeah, i would look into your college's policies on this sort of thing.
I work at an institution here in Canada that just recently put policies in place to prevent this sort of relationship. There are dire consequences for student and professor if they are caught.
However, before that (so even 2 years ago at this time) there was no issue at all.
Though if other students find out about it, you may find that some people begin to question whether you REALLY deserve the marks you are getting.. Just be prepared for that.
...............................
A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (24 May 2011):
 Why don't you read the school's regulations on the matter? I'm sure they'll have something to say about this.
Why not transfer out of his class; then there would be no issue.
...............................
A
female
reader, Smileypants +, writes (24 May 2011):
 Well, he may find himself out of a job...
Is he married?? If so then yes, its wrong.
If he's not married, it's still wrong in the sense that it's improper for a teacher/student to have relations. Other people could easily feel you get preferential treatment.
Transfer out of his class maybe??
...............................
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (24 May 2011):
 Yes it is very wrong and he could go to jail for crossing the line between student and teacher relations. Age doesnt come in to it here, I understand that you are an adult and over the age of consent but he is still a teacher and he knows that he cannot cross the line with his students and have personal relationships with them no matter what age they are. Maybe in your country it is different but I think he should look in to his work contract and see what happens to teachers who engage in relationships with there students. His career could end if anybody finds out. Good Luck.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 May 2011): I am a little confused here because if you are from saudi arabia then as I know, in your culture and religion it is extremly dangerous for a female to have sex before marriage.Have you thought about the consequences on you and your family if you are found out.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 May 2011): Other than the fact he could lose his job, and it will be partly your fault, I personally think its okay. Though I will likely get slammed for saying that. Take the "he's my professor" out of it and you two are just consenting adults.
I think the ethical problem comes up when it comes to position of authority over your education.
You better be prepared for the consequences if you two get caught. You can consent, but you best know what you are consenting too when the seat gets hot.
...............................
|
