A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i just want to know is it normal to have pains everytime you have sex and you dont enjoy it at all,i am 22 and never ejoyed sex, im very worried as i always end up crying during sex....and one more thing me and my boyfriend had sex about a month ago,now i feel nauseous yet i had my periods ,i feel very nauseous after drinking fluids-especaily cooldrinks..and am forever tired
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female
reader, Outre +, writes (2 June 2012):
Well thank you all for the advice but i think i didnt clarify myslef i ment when ever i have sex which will be like after a period of time it will be very painful... i broke my virginity when i was 18 years old and realy dont have sex often.. its my 4th time having sex yet i am paining and i doubt i will ever enjoy it and as the nausrous feeling its cuming after i drink o eat..i doubt wherthe im pregnant as i just got my periods but what makes me think theres a posibility is we had unprotected sex?
A
female
reader, mystiquek  +, writes (2 June 2012):
 The smartest action for you to take is to go see a doctor, preferably a gynecologist. We are not doctors here, and even if we were, there is no way we could be 100% certain of the diagnosis without an examination. It is by no means normal to have pain every time you have sex! Even being a virgin, the pain doesn't keep happening every time unless 1. something is wrong 2. not enough lubrication 3. the guy is just too rough. PLEASE GO SEE A DOCTOR to relieve your mind!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 June 2012): Sorry to read about your situation. The first thing that came to mind when I read your story was that perhaps you were not physically ready for sex the first few times and it was uncomfortable? That is totally normal by the way; it is painful at first. But then what can happen is that in anticipation of sexual intercourse, the body 'down there' tightens up and it makes penetration very difficult and of course very painful for the lady - the condition has a name and it's called vaginisimus. I am not saying that's what's wrong but it's a possibility. If it is that, it's not a serious medical condition but it needs to be brought to the attention of your doctor so that he/she can provide the necessary help and also just to check that there is nothing else wrong. If you are really find sex so unpleasant and painful that you are crying during it, this is really not good for you or your boyfriend and I think that you both must feel really bad about it. I am not surprised that you are worried but I think that you will be reassured if you go to your doctor for a checkup and then be as open about all this as you can be with your partner. You may just need to take things a bit slower in future so that you are really relaxed both mentally and physically before even trying sex. That doesn't mean that you can't be loving and intimate in the mean time - us girls know that it's not all about penetrative sex, after all! Good luck, don't worry and get yourself to a doctor to ease your mind. In the mean time, give yourself and your body a break from sex. Take care x
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (1 June 2012):
 I think you should go see a doctor, we can't know what's wrong over the internet. Being tired all the time and feeling sick is never good. Sex should never hurt to the point where you're crying either.
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A
male
reader, downonmyluck +, writes (1 June 2012):
hi,I used to do a lot of counseling here online for marriage & family counseling & also sex therapy, although I'm not a licensed counselor i have been told I may have missed my calling! I;ve been told by several people that the information was well appreciated. Hope I can do the same for you too! You've mentioned you're 22 yrs. old.. Not sure here how long you were a virgin...but yes its quite normal to have pains the first few times while having sex. In time the pains you;re experiencing should go away however.A lot of it mainly has to do with having pain upon having your virginity taken away from you & not being used to having sex.The national average for times having sex in a week is 3. Not sure what do tell you about being nauseous, that's some you might want to check out with your doctor.But i can tell you that its really not too good to drink cold drinks while being out in the hot sun if that's the case here. You;re better off taking small sips of drink in a shaded area.I'm guessing here that you're feeling tired after being out in the sun for long periods of time? But more importantly here I would be more concerned about exactly why you've never enjoyed sex. Not enjoying it because of the pain you speak about is certainly understandable. But not enjoying it for other reasons is another.Could it possibly be you're not enjoying sex because of your b/f or whoever it may be? Or it's very possible neither one of you is enjoying it because you might be just a little scared from being inexperienced? I do wish you well!
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A
male
reader, Giroud +, writes (1 June 2012):
 so the pains is because your not getting lubrication? do you get the pains while your using condoms?
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