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female
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*weetness86
writes: Hey, I'm 20 and i've been with my boyfriend for 18 months now. I had sex for the first time after 4 mnths of being with him. The problem is it still hurts initially when we do it so this puts me off. Is this normal or have I got some kind of problem?! please help! i feel so embaressed!xx Reply to this Question
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female
reader, peppersalt  +, writes (11 April 2007):
often the first entry hurts me, no matter how turned on I am or how lubed we are. i find it better to be on top so i can ease him in, then stay still a few seconds until i have gotten used to him. then it's usually fine. unless you're really use I think a bit of discomfort is normal for something that large going in intially.
also might be a medical problem, I've suffered from cystitis so it could be related to that. ask your doctor.
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 April 2006): Hi I have the same problem now with my boyfriend, because he's always in a hurry to get in there. But then I just calm him down and tell him to take it slowly. It's more fun anyways. Use Ky Jel if nothing else help, works just as good. Good luck!!!!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 April 2006): hey girl, being a female my self i no what your going through i had sex with a few people before i started going out with my new boyfriend (bob) but the first few times i had sex with (bob) it hurt to. I think it was more because i was nervous then anything try to relax with him get in the mood start off with oral then move into sex ask him to put it in slowly and start slow try talking about it with him i no it may be hard but the more you talk about it the better it will get for you....good luck girl and just remember that the more comfortable an relax you are the better....have fun!
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female
reader, lisa_01  +, writes (24 April 2006):
 don't totally believe its normal, i though the same thing but it turns out i have endometriosis and when my bf and i have sex if he touches certain places inside me it hurts badly and makes me feel sick, maybe visit your gynecologist for an examination.
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female
reader, Angel ron +, writes (23 April 2006):
 it is quite common
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female
reader, Juliette +, writes (23 April 2006):
 It probably hurts because you are nervous and also dry. Your boyfriend is possibly inexperienced and just wants to get in there. It may be more fun for both of you if he slows down and VERY gently works on making you want sex rather than the focus being on him satisfying his urgent need once you get started. I suggest you play a game of no sex, just touching for a while until you feel you want it, and believe me you will if he gets his act together. He should very gently play with you in a way that makes you feel he is not going to hurt you, use KY jelly if necessary, or Yoghurt even!
You turn yourself on by touching him but do not make him cum or else he will not want to finish the job. You will find you get very wet down there and as you feel you want sex, you muscles will relax and open up ready for him, even then he must be told to proceed slowly or else it will have the opposite effect and not go in his favour.
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 April 2006): Believe me, it's very normal to feel pain when you have sex, especially if your boyfriend's member is a little larger than normal. I don't know if that's the case for you or not, but that's the case for me. I found it was very helpful to ask my boyfriend to start out slow at first so that it wasn't as painful. That helped very much for me to get over the pain I felt when intially starting sex. There's no need to feel embarassed about it, because it's very normal. I felt embarassed to ask my boyfriend to take it slow at first, but it only boosted his ego when I said he was just too big, lol. Do what you can to make it less painful at first, then it will be more enjoyable afterward. Good luck to you! I hope it all works out for you!
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